PSA-171204-Just Thinking

 

Lying around, pondering the problems of the world, I realized that, at my age, I don’t really give a rat’s ass anymore. If walking is good for your health, the postman would be immortal. A whale swims all day, only eats fish, and drinks water, but is still fat. A rabbit runs, and hops, and only lives 15 years, while a tortoise doesn’t run, and does mostly nothing, yet it lives for 150 years. And they tell us to exercise? I don’t think so.
Now that I’m older, here’s what I’ve discovered:
1.  I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
2. My wild oats are mostly enjoyed with prunes and all-bran.
3. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.
4. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.
5. If all is not lost, then where the heck is it?
6. It was a whole lot easier to get older, than it was to get wiser.
7. Some days, you’re the top dog, some days you’re the hydrant.
8. I wish the buck really did stop here; I sure could use a few of them.
9. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.
10. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.
11. It is hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.
12. The world only beats a path to your door when you’re in the bathroom.
13. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he’d have put them on my knees.
14. When I’m finally holding all the right cards, everyone wants to play chess.
15. It is not hard to meet expenses . . . They’re everywhere.
16. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth..
17. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter . .
I go somewhere to get something,
and then wonder what I’m “here after”.
18. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.
19. It is a lot better to be seen than viewed.
20. Have I sent this message to you before…or did I get it from you?
Always do right.  This will gratify some people and astonish the rest
– Mark Twain

PSA-171117-Philosophy?

♦ The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet was because nobody was married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all single. The only married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk.

♦ I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.

♦ When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body. Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts.

♦ Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?

♦ America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won’t cross the street to vote.

♦ You know that tingly little feeling you get when you love someone? That’s your common sense leaving your body.

♦ Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?

♦ My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.

♦ I think my neighbor is stalking me as she’s been Googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.

♦ Money talks … but all mine ever says is good-bye.

♦ You’re not fat, you’re just easier to see.

♦ If you think nobody cares whether you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.

♦ I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do they just give you a bra and say, “Here, fill this out?”

♦ I can’t understand why women are OK that JC Penny has an older women’s clothing line named, “Sag Harbor.”

♦ My therapist said that my narcissism causes me to misread social situations. I’m pretty sure she was hitting on me.

♦ My 60 year kindergarten reunion is coming up soon and I’m worried about the 175 pounds I’ve gained since then.

♦ Denny’s has a slogan, “If it’s your birthday, the meal is on us.” If you’re in Denny’s and it’s your birthday, your life sucks!

♦ The pharmacist asked me my birth date again today. I’m pretty sure she’s going to get me something.

♦ The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can go in a robe before you start looking like a mental patient.

♦ I think it’s pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely out of tattoos.

♦ Money can’t buy happiness, but it keeps the kids in touch!

♦ I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year. Not to cause any trouble, but shouldn’t that be an even number.

 

Walk Away

I just added another book read to my list. Without a doubt this was the most painful book I ever forced myself to read. The cover picture of a couple of kids on a bike sucked me into it. I am a sucker for bikes and bike riding. The author Viet Thanh Nguyen is a refugee from the Viet Nam War, or as he referred to it The American Wa.. He speaks eloquent english and writes the same. I found myself opening the dictionary to understand some of his word selections. The last word I had to look up is solipsism. I never heard it or saw it used before. Solipsism is a view or theory that the self is all that can be known to exist.

9780674660342

The last time I heard a speaker talk to me this way was in college when I took metaphysics. I didn’t understand it then nor did I understand much of what this guy was telling me. I was sooo tempted to return the book without finishing it. I kept hoping the next chapter would be the one that made sense, it did not happen. I finally understood the Epilogue because it he wrote it as a narrative about his life.

If you are into philosophy you will enjoy this book. If you like a regular everyday story like I do you will walk away from it.

All through the read I kept remembering the professor I had at Saint Joseph’s College who taught metaphysics. I kept telling myself that guys like Viet Than Nguyen are teaching at our colleges(he is Associate Professor of English and American Studies & Ethnicity at the University of Southern California) and warping the minds of our youth. None of what he wrote made sense and I wondered how he ever found a publisher to take this book on, then I saw it was the Harvard University Press.  I have too little time left on this good earth to waste my minutes with unsatisfying work such as this. I have nobody to blame but myself.

 

Words That Make You Think

A friend from my book club sent this post titled

“Philosophers of this Century.”  

I thought it good enough to share.

****************************************************************

ATT00058

  ~ John Glenn…

As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind – every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder

ATT00061

~ Desmond Tutu…
When the white missionaries came to Africa they had the Bible and we had the land.
They said ‘Let us pray.’ We closed our eyes.
When we opened them we had the Bible and they had the land.

ATT00064

~ David Letterman…
America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked.

ATT00067

~ Howard Hughes…
I’m not a paranoid, deranged millionaire. I’m a billionaire.

ATT00070

~ Old Italian proverb…
After the game, the King and the pawn go into the same box.

ATT00073

~ Betsy Salkind…
Men are like linoleum floors. Lay ’em right and you can walk all over them for thirty years.ATT00076

~ Jean Kerr…
The only reason they say ‘Women and children first’ is to test the strength of the lifeboats.

ATT00079

~ Zsa Zsa Gabor…

I’ve been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out the garbage.

ATT00082

~ Jeff Foxworthy…
You know you’re a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn’t.

ATT00085

~ Prince Philip…
When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.

ATT00088

~ Emo Philips…
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.

ATT00091

~ Harrison Ford…
Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself.

ATT00094

~ Spike Milligan…
The best cure for Sea Sickness, is to sit under a tree.

ATT00097

~ Robin Hall…

Lawyers believe a person is innocent until proven broke.

ATT00100

~ Jean Rostand…
Kill one man and you’re a murderer, kill a million and you’re a conqueror

ATT00103

~ Arnold Schwarzenegger…
Having more money doesn’t make you happier. I have 50 million dollars but I’m just as happy as when I had 48 million.

ATT00106

~ WH Auden…
We are here on earth to do good unto others. What the others are here for, I have no idea.

ATT00109

~ Jonathan Katz…
In hotel rooms I worry. I can’t be the only guy who sits on the furniture naked

ATT00112

~ Johnny Carson…
If life were fair, Elvis would still be alive today and all the impersonators would be dead.

ATT00115

~ Warren Tantum… (School photo album).
I don’t believe in astrology. I am a Sagittarius and we’re very skeptical

ATT00118

~ Steve Martin…
Hollywood must be the only place on earth where you can be fired by a man wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a baseball cap

ATT00121

~ Jimmy Durante…
Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is.

ATT00124

~ Doug Hanwell…
America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric.

ATT00127

~ George Roberts…
The first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone

ATT00130

~ Jonathan Winters…
If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport.

ATT00133

~ Robert Benchley…
I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.

What Is Going On?

Is it just me or do you wonder why our country is in such trouble? Listen to Rand Paul explain what is going on and then tell me who is at fault?

Happy Anniversary GJP

Quote from novelist Ayn Rand.

Quote from novelist Ayn Rand. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Today marks the fourth year since the birth of Grumpa Joe’s Place blog.  In the beginning I wanted a blog that would give me a teaching opportunity. The object was to convince people of the huge potential they carry within themselves. Topics like goal setting, baby steps, project management, visioning, self talk, defining goals, you name it, if it related to getting things done and making lives more productive I wanted to cover it. At first I did, then something happened to steer me off course. The campaign for the 2008 election began and my goal changed. I saw something happening very early that made me realize a danger coming that many people would not recognize, i.e. socialism under the disguise of modern progressivism.

My entire being focused on stopping the Democrat take over. It didn’t matter if it was Obama or Hillary, they promote the same philosophy. After the election and I realized failure, the goal changed to one of stopping Progressives from anymore take overs. My entire being concentrates on that one goal, stop socialism from happening in America.

Maybe I’m too old to understand that young people want someone to care for them because they are not capable of doing it themselves. I wish I could adopt that mindset, it would be so much easier, for a while anyway. That is, until everyone finally wakes up to find the evil capitalists replaced by even more evil bureaucrats. There will be differences however, under evil capitalism, liberty allowed me to decide how hard to work to make a successful life. Under socialism, evil government will decide what you do in life, and life is not worth writing home about. Everyone will be equal. Think about that, everyone will drive the same car, live in the same kind of house, watch the same brand of TV on the same channel, and there is only one because that is the only way to give everyone equal entertainment. All of us will sit on the same kind of couch, go to the same doctors, make the same amount of money, and have the same number of babies of each sex. If a baby is the wrong sex, you may  decide to have an abortion, or send baby to a government exchange. There, you get to take home a baby of the right sex, or to try again until you get it right.

One thing that GJP has done is open my mind to new ideas from books. Most of the time, I read conservative authors because I still have the liberty to do so. “Atlas Shrugged” is a favorite. Author Ayn Rand saw the future when she wrote this story. I believe the premise for her book begins during the 2008-2012 period. Her story actually begins in the year 2016. If we keep the same political leaders we have, it will only take until 2016 for progressivism to transform America into a mindless population that waits for the next order to come down from the politiburo.

I like to think of myself as characters Hank Rearden or Dagny Taggert who prevail in spite of the complete and inevitable take over of all private enterprise by the élite progressives who steer the country for the good of everyone. To make this story short, even Rearden finally quits and seeks a new beginning through John Galt.

Who is John Galt?

“We are fast approaching the stage of the ultimate inversion: The stage where the government is free to do anything it pleases, while the citizens may act only by permission – which is the stage of the darkest periods of human history, the stage of rule by brute force.”[6] 

 Ayn Rand

Ameritopia is Atlas Shrugged

Life is a Party

I received the following  piece of wisdom from an e-mail friend. It is a beautiful philosophy of life by Ann Wells of the  Los Angeles Times. The link below takes you to the original story from which it was extracted. I thank Ms Wells for writing this beautiful perspective on enjoying life’s moments.  Her  inspiration came while reflecting on her  sister’s death.

*The last line says it all. *

Dear Bertha,

. . . I’m reading more and dusting less. I’m sitting in the yard and admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the  garden. I’m spending more time with my family and friends and less time working.

Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experiences to savor, not to endure. I’m trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them.

I’m not “saving” anything; we use our good china and crystal for every special event such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, or the first Amaryllis blossom.

I wear my good blazer to the market. My theory is if I look prosperous, I can shell out $28.49 for one small bag of groceries. I’m not saving my good perfume for special parties, but wearing it for clerks in the hardware store and tellers at the bank.

“Someday” and “one of these days” are losing their grip on my vocabulary. If it’s worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it now

I’m not sure what others would’ve done had they known they wouldn’t be here for the tomorrow that we all take for granted. I think they would have called family members and a few close friends. They might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for past squabbles. I like to think they would have gone out for a Chinese dinner or for whatever their favorite food was.

I’m guessing; I’ll never know.

It’s those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew my hours were limited. Angry because I hadn’t written certain letters that I intended to write one of these days. Angry and sorry that I didn’t tell my husband and parents often enough how much I truly love them. I’m trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes, tell myself that it is special.

Every day, every minute, every breath truly is a gift from God.

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.

“Good Night Mrs. Callabash.”

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