Religious Musings

Borrowed from a blogger friend

A comprehensive observation about common religions and religious practices.

Jainism: You must not disturb shit

Bhuddism: You must become one with the shit.

Taoism: Shit happens

Shintoism: Our ancestors thought of this shit.

Hinduism: Eating meat makes you a shit person.

Paganism: Here’s some shit that represents other shit.

Reform Judiasm: Lots of shit happened to us, try not to eat pork and shrimp.

Conservative Judaism: Lots of shit happened to us, We will frown if your shit smells like pork or shrimp.

Orthodox Judaism: Don’t do shit on Saturday. And lots of shit happened to us. And stay away from that pork and shrimp shit.

Sunni Islam: Mohammed passed down his shit to us via his son in law.

Shia Islam: Mohammed passed down his shit via his Father in Law.

Wahabbi Islam: Let’s blow up some shit.

Catholicism: You must not eat certain shit on Friday.

Orthodox Christianity:. Same shit, only it’s a week late.

Episcopalianism: Here’s some shit. Wanna go for a clam bake?

Lutheranism: Here’s 95 pieces of shit. Wanna go out for some jello salad?

Methodists: Here’s some shit. You’ll get new shit once every 6 years. Want some roasted corn?

Southern Baptists: Don’t let black people into this shit. Also, don’t do shit on Sunday.

Seventh Day Adventists: Black people are welcome. Also, don’t do shit on Saturday.

Jehovah’s Witnesses: Knock Knock. Who’s there? Shit.

Latter Day Saints: Knock knock. Who’s there? Shit from space.

Scientology: Knock knock: Who’s there? Shit from space. But we’ll cut you off from your family worse than the previous two.

Rastafarianism: Let’s smoke some shit.

New Age: Let’s gather some crystals and shit.

Bahai faith: We combined shit from all over the world and made it into a new kind of shit.

Agnostism: We don’t know if the shit exists or not.

Weak Atheism: There’s no evidence for shit existing

Strong atheism: Shit doesn’t exist.

Deism: This shit doesn’t really care about us.

GOD’S Accuracy

GOD’S ACCURACY 

 When GOD solves our problems, we have faith in HIS abilities. When GOD doesn’t solve our problems, HE has faith in our abilities. 

One may observe God’s accuracy in the hatching of eggs. . . . 
those of the canary in 14 days;
those of the barnyard hen in 21 days;
eggs of ducks and geese in 28 days;
those of the mallard in 35 days;
the eggs of the parrot and the ostrich hatch in 42 days. (Notice, they are all divisible by seven, the number of days in a week!) 

 See God’s wisdom in the making of an elephant. . . . 
The four legs of this great beast all bend forward in the same direction. No other quadruped is so made.
God planned that this animal would have a huge body – too large to live on two legs. For this reason He gave
it four fulcrums so that it can rise from the ground easily. The horse rises from the ground on its two front legs first.
A cow rises from the ground with its two hind legs first.  How wise the Lord is in all His works of creation!  Each watermelon has an even number of stripes on the rind.  Each orange has an even number of segments. 
Each ear of corn has an even number of rows. 
Each stalk of wheat has an even number of grains. Every bunch of bananas has on its lowest row an even number of bananas, and each row decreases by one, so that one row has an even number and the next row an odd number. 

 Amazing! There’s more…  The waves of the sea roll in on shore twenty-six to the minute in all kinds of weather.  All grains are found in even numbers on the stalks.  God has caused the flowers to blossom at certain specified times during the day. Linnaeus, the great botanist, once said that if he had a conservatory containing the right kind of soil, moisture, and temperature, he could tell the time of day or night by the flowers that were open and those that were closed.  The lives of each of us may be ordered by the Lord in a beautiful way for His glory, if we will only entrust Him with our lives. If we try to regulate our own lives, we will have only mess and failure.  Only God, who made our brains and hearts, can successfully guide them to a profitable end.  

When you carry the Bible, Satan has a headache; when you open it, he collapses.  When he sees you reading it, he loses his strength, and when you stand on the Word of God, Satan can’t hurt you! And did you also know…  …that when you are about to forward this email to others, the devil will probably try to discourage you, but do it anyway. Life without God is like an unsharpened pencil – it has no point.

 I pray God bless you in ways you never even dreamed. I didn’t think twice about forwarding this one – and I hope you don’t, either. Pass on the blessings!!

Instinctive Racism

Some of the things that leftist haters have labeled me as are a racist, a misogenist, a sexist, a colonizer, and with white privilege. In a recent article on how bad our inner city schools are I learned that our poor grammar school kids are not very proficient in math or reading, but are highly proficient in Black Lives Matter. Testing at ten percent proficiency in reading and math, but ninety percent on social issues like B L M. I guess if you are a black kid growing up with that kind of brain washing why would you be interested in learning how to read and do arithmetic? Nonetheless an agent of the Chicago Teachers Union rabidly proclaimed that my racist, misogenistic, sexist attitude is why these kids have a problem. If I were to send the CTU more money things would get better, that is, for the teacher’s pension fund and hospitalization payments, but I’m afraid the kids would still not be able to read or do simple math. Chicago and most big cities across the country already spend considerably more to keep a student in school than is spent in the surrounding white, and mixed-race suburbs.

The one term I have not heard used is one I am coining in this sentence, instinctive racism. All of us are born with instinct to control our most natural functions like breathing, eating, procreating, and a hatred for those unlike us. It doesn’t matter if you are white hating black, or black hating white it is programmed into our brains at the time of conception.

I used to think that racial hatred was taught, but my parents did not teach us to dislike blacks, unless it was subliminal. They migrated here from a european country where they never saw a black face. They socialized with people from the same country as much as they could. It is easier to socialize with someone who speaks your language. Mom and Dad sent us to a parochial school, where the good nuns never ever spoke of racial difference. How could they? Jesus never taught any racial differences. Looking at the bible stories they are loaded with the divisions between peoples from various parts of the world, but never in any teachings related to color. So how then did I get indoctrinated in racism? My conclusion is the press did it. The only outside influence that could have taught me to hate blacks were the newspaper stories, and pictures of the day. It was in the sixties when I really began to watch and read the news. Those were the years when the black’s were on the move to change their plight in the world. It was a steady stream of information all proclaiming the problems blacks had with whites and vice versa. I learned that blacks were to be hated by my classmates in high school. Even though the teachers in school never taught racism, my class mates came from families where racism prevailed. Where did they get it? Where did they learn racism? From their parents of course, and where did the parents learn racism? from their co-workers and neighbors. Or, they never learned it. Maybe their racism was wakened from within. Their instinct kicked in and directed them to not like these strange people who were so different. Add to the instinct the outside influences of others whose instinct also kicked in and the problem is large. Since there are easily five times as many whites as there are blacks in America, instinctive racism was a force not to be reckoned with.

Slavery was also a vector to racism. Just where did the slave trader get the idea that blacks from primitive countries in Africa were sub-human? Most likely the whites were too ignorant to have original thoughts that would head them in this direction, but most likely it was their instinct that drove them to think that way.

Yes, slavery begat the foundation of racist thought. If the slave owners were all christian people who loved their neighbors they wouldn’t have entertained the idea of black people as sub-human who were put on this earth to be traded as animals and sub-humans. Except that it was a practical idea to supply labor to help plantation owners make money. What better way than to buy a few sub-humans to do the work? The sub-human thing is what changed the thinking of human beings to subjugate others into their service. If the owners had considered the blacks as equals, they couldn’t have bought and sold them at will. But, if the buyer’s instincts were instructing him that blacks were a lower class of human animal it would make sense.

Psychologists like to believe that basic instincts can be changed over time. What will have to happen to make the Chicago Teacher’s Union be a lovable group is to enact policies and direct energy into the white community to make the change in white minds to move away from instinctive racism. It is my opinion that changing instinctive racist drives is possible but not in less than ten generations after such policies have been enacted, but only if both races try equally hard to change.

Here is what I would like to see happen: 1. Teacher’s Unions across the country stop pushing for more money to teach. On the other side, 2. I would like politicians to stop using the blacks as a pawn to justify their means to rule us. Maybe ten generations is too fast to make this happen. Then again if both sides coordinated their efforts a synergistic movement may take place and change could be effected in one generation.

Will I Ever See the Inside of Church Again?

Why do I need to make a reservation to visit the Lord? He was never that busy before to not let me in. This time, however, it is not because He is busy, it is because government thinks it is safer to stay away from Church. Safer? Since when did visiting with God depend on my safety? I would rather place myself in harms way than to avoid the Almighty. Dying may not be so bad after all. Isn’t that the goal of life is to die? Dying gets us to the pearly gates, it may not get us in, but at least we may get to see the gates. Who knows perhaps I’d get a sneek peek at God Himself when the gate opens for someone to enter?

Religion is not something I normally discuss out loud and never in public. Unlike politics, which I shoot myself in the foot with all the time. Politics is different than religion, thank God for that. It would be nice, though if politicians practiced their faith more when running for office. I too often get the feeling that I am supposed to forgive all the lies and deceit spewed by politicians as political rhetoric. Somehow lies become allowed when speaking politically. I would really like politicians to tell me their personal definition of a lie.

One of the most common arguments comes from taking a statement out of context and labeling it a lie. For instance. Back in January, he said the Chinese COVID-19 Virus is harmless.” three months later after science has proved that COVID-19 is deadly, we claim the speaker told a lie. Duh! At the time he said it he based his statement on the scientific evidence of the day. It wasn’t a lie it was a statement that has been proven wrong by time. Yet, I detect false claims of lies almost daily on the news.

Polls are another form of lie. Yesterday I reported counting yard signs along the highway in Wisconsin and took an impromptu poll. I reported that Biden was ahead of Trump in Wisconsin. Did my poll really prove that? No. Polls need data, lots of data that can be statistically calculated with some degree of certainty that the prediction is correct. I venture to say that six yards signs on a short piece of highway is not statistically accurate. When I worked as an engineer, I was always placed in a situation where I needed to come up with answers immediately. Most times I was trying to determine if a new design was better, stronger, etc. than the standard. With the time I had to do the work I used a method I had developed to make the assessment. Years later After taking a course in statistics I learned that my method was one of pure guesstimating. I had a fifty fifty chance of making an accurate choice between designs. Now, when I hear reports stating that a poll shows one candidate ahead of another I laugh and dismiss it completely. The trouble is that average citizens do not look at the statistical relevancy of a poll, they merely remember the result they hear reported. To me that report constitutes a lie, but the result is touted as the truth.

When I look at candidates, I try to assess them relative to past performance. If it is a new candidate who never had a political life before, it is harder, but I then look at the candidates character and his record in his current job. If the candidate has been in office before I look at his promises and measure them against his results. Did he keep his promises. Did I believe the promises he made were in alignment with my own politics? If he kept his promises then I would be prone to vote for him. If he made promises, but absolutely no effort to fulfill them I will not vote for him, he is liar using political rhetoric only to gain my vote.

The one thing I had against Obama was his promise to “fundamentally change America.”

“Into what?” I asked, Obama never really answered that but during the course of the campaign he let out little hints that he was heading the country toward Communism. One particular hint came during a discourse with Joe the Plumber at a rally.

Another political scheme is to use the free press as your personal propaganda machine. It was no secret that the Democrats control the political message. The lazy free press buys the lies they are fed hook line and sinker and never challenge any of them. To this day, the free press that the Founder’s said was necessary to keep politicians honest has chosen to become an integral part of the machine. They constantly manufacture news by manipulating videos, photos, and interviews to lead people to their way of thinking. All of it is a giant lie. It is hard to understand which news organizations meet the Founder’s concept of reporting fairly.

My choices for political office all boil down to whose message and reporting do I trust the most. Of course that comes only after I chose the candidate that most closely agrees with my own political ideology.

Day 23-Quarantine-Group Meetings

This week I had opportunity to participate in three group meetings by phone. All three were different and I learned a lot from each, mostly how to operate an online video meeting. This afternoon was probably the most interesting because it was the most attended with eighteen participants, and because it was a support group for the visually impaired, not everyone had video. The service is called ZOOM. I have to admit it is a far cry better than the one I used when I was still working twenty years ago. I guess there has been some advancement in the past two decades.

Why am I attending a support group for the visually impaired? Several reasons: 1.) I am a Lion and we are Knights of the Blind as commissioned by Helen Keller (blind, deaf, and mute) in nineteen twenty-five. 2.) As a Lion, I want to understand the hardships that visually impaired people encounter.

There are many things that sighted people take for granted. Like being able to get into a car and to drive someplace, read a menu at a restaurant, or social isolation. What I was surprised to learn from this group is that they all sound as frustrated as I am about having the stay in place. One would think that blind people would be stuck at home most of the time, but they are not. Many spoke about not being able to get out to the store, or to church. Vision impaired people have trouble finding transportation, but somehow manage to find rides when they want them or need them. Most have recruited support systems for themselves.

This meeting was semi-formal in that the leader opened with an uplifting prayer and started the conversation. After that it became a friendly banter between people just as any group of friends would have. The group leader announced that they will hold a ZOOM meeting every week at the same time until such time as the COVID-19 is dead.

The second meeting I attended was a Lions Club Board meeting. I recommend we do this on a continuum since we finished a pretty complete agenda in thirty-five minutes. The third meeting was a Lions training session. The leader conducted a Power Point slide show with lecture while the attendees all showed at the side of the screen. During the question answer period attendees clicked on a icon of a raised hand so the moderator could give him the floor. This also worked good because it cut out people talking over one another. This meeting also lasted forty minutes.

One great thing that COVID-19 is doing is forcing us to use the technology that is available to us. This evening, Holy Thursday, Good Friday, Holy Saturday, and Easter Sunday, parishes all across the country will conduct video services.

I plan on opening a personal ZOOM account for my own use so I can gather all my grandkids together from three states for a face time phone chat on Easter Sunday.

Easter was always a huge celebration for my family. I have fond memories of my mother cooking and baking for the Easter morning breakfast, and the family gathering that followed. My wives Barbara, and Peggy celebrated the holy day similarly even though one was of Polish descent and the other Irish. Only the foods varied. My daughter and daughters-in-law have continued the tradition within our family. Now that we are a thousand miles apart it is difficult if not impossible to carry on the tradition as a combined family. That is why I am hoping the ZOOM service can allow us to gather as a group once again.

 

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