Locker Room Talk

LA-dodgers-professional-mlb-locker-room-slider1.jpg

An empty locker room, the only place where there is no lewd, lascivious, and bawdy talk.

I am laughing about the furor Donald Trump caused when a ten-year old audio tape of him speaking frankly on an open mike was aired. The Progressive media played it and spun it their way non-stop for the last few days. The morally corrupt Progressives who leave God out of everything, and who reject Christianity while embracing Islam have exposed themselves and their behaviors. I read a comment on a news article spewing the terrible nature of DT’s locker room talk,  “Progressives are all deriding such language and use of the word pussy as contempt for women, then went home to watch Fifty Shades of Grey.”

I have been in a lot of locker rooms over the years, and I can vouch to that kind of language and conversation goes on in many places beside the locker room. It seems to fall under the guise of testosterone loaded men who love to express their bodacious exploits among their competitive buddies. So what is the big deal?

To me the big deal is all the Republicans who turned 180 degrees and ran like hell, and are still running are the real pussies of the day. House speaker Paul Ryan is number one among them. It is his type of politician that the country is rebelling over. There was a time when Paul Ryan was my hero, then he became the House Speaker and he immediately adopted the role of puppet within the house. If he had any balls (oh excuse me please for using such a vulgarity) he would have stood tall and kept moving like nothing happened.

In the meantime, the Progressive colony in Hollywood continue to make films that fill our heads (and those of our children) with ideas that it is okay to kill, rape, have public sex, and a myriad of other sick sexual tendencies (50 Shades) all under the guise of art. Make a perfectly normal comment about a hot woman and the whole community goes into a snit.

Many men have two demeanors, one that lives within the man’s world and another that lives in the world of family. The two are rarely exposed or mixed. Wives are often shocked when  a husband screws up and uses the word fuck in a conversation. The same guy goes red and blushes apologetically for breaking his code. In modern times, like now, women have an equal tendency to use improper slang words. For instance, Hillary Clinton has been documented  using really foul slang in her discourse with men, most notably Secret Service Agents, and her husband. Perhaps it is because she wants to be more manly and tough sounding.

The bottom line is this. Find something worthwhile to talk about, and stop wasting my time on your liberal rants and hypocritical arguments about how bad your enemy is. Instead, begin to do your job by examining issues from both sides of the fence. Expose corruption, do not defend it like you do now. The Founding Fathers counted on  free press to keep the government straight. How else will we the people learn about the crooks in office?  What we have now is a reporting system that is under the spell of the crooks in office. Snap out of it! There was a time when I really believed that Obama’s many corrupt policies would be exposed by honest driving reporters just like Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein who exposed the Watergate case, and wouldn’t let it go until justice was served. They were real journalists, what we have now are people who read news from a teleprompter, and have no inclination to investigate or probe the leads that take them to the truth. Editors and producers are just as inept as the journalists. It is too easy to get your official words sent to you by the Government information agency. Our great communication organizations have become Tass and Pravda.

A Most Magnificent Sight

coyote_eastern_380

This morning I saw a most magnificent sight. I sat at the breakfast table downing my home cooked oatmeal while nursing a bad back. Really, should a back go out while brushing teeth. Well, mine did. I stood there scrubbing away when I felt this involuntary twist in my lower vertebrae with the accompanying ice pick in the back pain. So there I sat, with a scowl longer than Doctor Who’s scarf when I spotted a brown form pass by the skimmer in the pond. At first I thought it was a squirrel, but for some reason the squirrel idea didn’t gel. A few mouthfuls of oatmeal later I saw a full-grown coyote come into the yard behind the pond. He walked so fast I had to jump out of my chair to get a good look at him. I called out to Peg to come quick so she could see the critter too. Then a second coyote appeared from behind the pond. Both were full-grown and looked very similar to German Shepard dogs. Peg made it to the window in time to see them saunter off into the neighbor’s yard and out of sight. One of them, whom I assume was the male, lifted his leg and marked a few shrubs on the way out.

The whole scene lasted no more than one minute, but it served to make me forget the pain in the my back. I love those guys, I hope they come back soon.

All day Peg has been obsessing about coyotes killing smaller animals, and wanted to send out a general alert to everyone in Frankfort to warn them about the awful small animal eating coyotes on the prowl. Her obsessing also made me forget about the pain. Somehow, I would rather it were the coyotes.

Secret Places Where Features Hide

Each year I try to make my garden different. Even though there are elements that cannot change easily like a pond, hard-scaping, and all the perennials. There is however, plenty of opportunity to paint a picture in the blank spaces using different colors and plant materials. This year one of my goals was to plant a garden that would deter rabbits. I think I succeeded, that is the rabbits have given me the impression that I have succeeded. The episodes of Wabbit Wars have been sparse because the Wabbits have not been able to get to me as often.

My color palette is yellow and orange. I elected different varieties of Marigolds and sought out other species of yellow flowers to mix in like the gold Celosia, Lysimachia, Lantana, Marguerite Daisy, and Orange Joy Asiatic lily.  Close planting and weekly foliar fertilization helped the plants spread out and finally fill in the canvas. A seven minute video of the same plants would be terribly boring, so I decided to add some interest with winter scenes and an escape to the desert while I waited for Spring to arrive.

Yesterday, I posted a trailer using a new version of iMovie. It was my training session on how to use this new version of a program I was very comfortable with. The new version made posting on YouTube easier, but I felt it harder to compose the movie. There are so many short cuts built into this version that I had trouble doing things that make a movie a movie. The older version is more oriented to real movie makers. This new version targets a person interested in speed. I am sure all the features of the old version are in this new one, but I’m too old to want to spend all that time looking for the drop downs and secret places where features hide. In that regard, iMovie is a lot like Windows, it is the same stuff reorganized to make it look new and to make you work to find things. In a way, iMovie 10.0.4 is like my garden, it has many exciting things to see, but one must explore to find them.

Personal guided tours of the garden are available upon request. My favorite time to give a tour is between January and March, I spend less time touring and more time imbibing.

Please enjoy my garden called “The 2014-Monet Vision, Golden Glow”

A

 

Osaka Gardens

When the newsletter came from my garden club, and I read the next meeting is a field trip to Osaka gardens I got excited. Japanese gardens turn me on. They are among the most aesthetic works of art planted. All things about the gardens promote peace, serenity, and well-being. The placement of rocks, the stones selected for grain and texture, the plantings, and the flow of water all lend to the experience. Since I had  never heard of Osaka Gardens I had to find it on Map-Quest. Surprise, the garden is a tiny dot inside a huge tract on the south side of Chicago called Jackson Park. As a kid of thirteen I went to this park many times by streetcar to drown worms. The lagoons were very accessible to fisherman, and they connect to Lake Michigan making them abundant in fish species. I kept my record intact, I never caught a single fish there, but I spent many happy hours trying.

The map program pinpointed the place exactly and the adventure began. Getting there after a sixty-three year absence made it more exciting. As it turned out, the map program and the GPS took the excitement out of the ride because I merely followed instructions and got to the exact place without a single wrong turn.

At the parking lot our members grouped and found Karen Szyjka waiting for us. This young woman sports the impressive title of Operations Support Manager, Department of Natural Resources for the Chicago Park District.  She explained her role as one of managing and maintaining the Osaka Garden and other Park District gardens in Grant Park. Karen was a fantastic tour guide. She told us about every aspect of the Osaka Gardens and the history of the place. Even though I have lived in the Chicago area all of my life I had never heard about the place. Yet, it came into existence during the Columbian Exposition in 1893.  During its lifespan the garden has gone through several reconstructions. The garden went into decline after years of wear and then needed reconstitution and refurbishing. The worst decline happened during the nineteen forties. Hello, I guess we were not very happy about the Japanese bombing Pearl Harbor.

Currently the garden is very happy, and Karen has made it her life’s work. She knows every tree, plant, rock, and pebble in the garden. She spoke to us with passion and excitement during her hour-long walk along the path winding around the garden. The views of the Museum of Science and Industry, the only building remaining from the Exposition and the World’s Fair, framed by the garden were astounding. My point and shoot camera did not do the views justice, neither did the photographer.

After the tour, most of our group stayed and picnicked along the shores of the lagoons watching the beauty around them. Peg and I escaped for a second adventure on our own. I decided to tour my boyhood neighborhood, and awaken some old memories. A wise man once wrote “you can never go back home,” and I will add “and you shouldn’t.”

If you get the opportunity to visit the Osaka Garden take it. If you are a garden nut or just a Chicago nut, you will love it.

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A View From the Kitchen Window

After the news I got today that my former employer-mentor died I have to do something positive. On Wednesday this week, I presented our garden club with a movie titled Floral Wonders. The film is really a slide show of member’s flower gardens. This morning I decided to break out my segment of the original. I call it “2012 Monet Vision, A View From the Kitchen Window.” I moved a lot of stuff around and added a few more photos from my garden then added  new music.  It took me most of the day with all the interruptions I had. While the movie processed, I went out for my walk as a reward. When I returned the first thing I did was upload the file to YouTube. I wanted to share the film on grumpajoesplace. Unfortunately, YouTube took a long time to process the upload. That is when I switched to my e-mails and the day blew up.

Right now I’m working off a wine buzz after making a fantastic dish of wheat penne pasta with caramelized onions and sautéed broccoli smothered in sour cream and topped with a Tilapia fillet.

This year’s Monet Vision promised to be outstanding after that mild winter, but the über hot June and July did everything it could to roast the plants in place. In fact, I wound up replacing many  annuals with new ones, and my Lady’s Mantle perennials died of thirst. I hope you enjoy this video.

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The video I mentioned in the last line, well, where is it? I wanted to post this story yesterday, but another IED went off and changed my day. It seems that we can ignore any law we want in the DSA (Divided States of America) except copyright laws. Google threatened to ban me from using their site if I persist in using copyrighted music in my videos. I featured music played by my friend Roger from Starperry Studios in Mulberry Florida with his permission. That is not good enough. The copyrights belong to dead people who actually wrote the tunes not the musicians that play it. They actually belong to companies that purchased the copyrights from the dead people’s heirs. I won’t elaborate on all the laws our government is ignoring in this piece but they are many.

I searched the net for royalty free music to download and redid the movie. I don’t like the tunes, but they are okay.  I crashed and burned before I could get it all completed for my self-imposed deadline.

One more time, please enjoy  “2012 Monet Vision, A View From the Kitchen Window.”

A Billion Seconds Ago it Was 1959

Title: "No, No! Not That Way" Locati...

Title: "No, No! Not That Way" Location: Library of Congress, Prints and Photographs Division (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This is too true to be funny. The next time you hear a politician use the Word ‘billion’ in a casual manner, think about whether you want the ‘politicians’ spending YOUR tax money. A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, But one advertising agency did a good job of Putting that figure into some perspective in One of its releases.

A. A billion seconds ago it was 1959.

B. A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive.

C. A billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age.

D. A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet.

E. A billion dollars ago was only 8 hours and 20 minutes, at the rate our government is spending it. While this thought is still fresh in our brain… let’s take a look at New Orleans …. It’s amazing what you can learn with some simple division. Louisiana Senator, Mary Landrieu (D) was asking Congress for 250 BILLION DOLLARS To rebuild New Orleans . Interesting number… What does it mean?

A. Well .. If you are one of the 484,674 residents of New Orleans (every man, woman and child) You each get$516,528

B. Or… If you have one of the 188,251 homes in New Orleans , your home gets $1,329,787.

C. Or… If you are a family of four… Your family gets$2,066,012. Washington ,

D.C HELLO! Are all your calculators broken??

Building Permit Tax

CDL License Tax Cigarette Tax

Corporate Income Tax

Dog License Tax

Federal Income Tax (Fed)

Federal Unemployment Tax (FU TA)

Fishing License Tax

Food License Tax

Fuel Permit Tax

Gasoline Tax

Hunting License Tax

Inheritance Tax

Inventory Tax

IRS Interest Charges (tax on top of tax)

IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)

Liquor Tax

Luxury Tax

Marriage License Tax

Medicare Tax

Property Tax

Real Estate Tax

Service charge Taxes

Social Security Tax

Road Usage Tax (Truckers)

Sales Taxes

Recreational Vehicle Tax

School Tax

State Income Tax

State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)

Telephone Federal Excise Tax

Telephone Federal Universal Service Fee Tax

Telephone Federal, State and Local Surcharge Tax

Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax

Telephone Recurring and Non-recurringCharges Tax

Telephone State and Local Tax

Telephone Usage ChargeTax Utility Tax

Vehicle License Registration Tax

Vehicle Sales Tax

Watercraft Registration Tax

Well Permit Tax

Workers Compensation Tax

And to think, we left British Rule to avoid so many taxes.

STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY?

Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago… And our nation was the most prosperous in the world.

We had absolutely no national debt… We had the largest middle class in the world…

And Mom stayed home to raise the kids. What happened?

Can you spell ‘politicians’!

And I still have to Press ‘1’ For English.

I hope this goes around the USA At least 100 times

What the heck happened?????

TAXED ENOUGH ALREADY

Thank you Sharon.

CINO, Conservative In Name Only

Today, I began my war against the terror organization known as Bull Thistle. As I patiently applied toxins to foliage with a brush to keep overspray from killing innocent victims, it finally occurred to me, gardens are naturally conservative. The natural law rules and plants are genetically programmed to win any affront to upset the balance. On the flip side, gardeners are the far left liberals. We constantly try to force our will upon Nature and its horticultural specimens to form a more perfect society. Gardeners are racist too. We chose to believe that some specimens are more desirable than others, and therefore, the undesirables are definitely open to annihilation.

When will we liberal gardeners learn that the order of Nature will persevere?  When will gardeners stop the foolishness of imposing their idea of what is beautiful and morally correct upon nature? Anyone who gardens knows that a beautiful society of plantdom has to be carefully controlled. Unwanted specimens are culled to keep the vision beautiful. If the maintenance slows or if it stops, the vision automatically reverts to the natural order of things. In some cases it reverts to something that is less than natural, because the gardener brought in specimens from outside his zone of influence to fill the lack of diversity. Many times the imports are without predators and thrive within the vision to overtake the locals.

So here I am, a boneheaded Conservative trying to impose my will upon the 2012 Monet Vision, in order to create a Utopian society of horticultural matter in an environment that repels my efforts to create heaven on earth.

“It’s a losin’ fight.” —–WIlliam Bendix as Riley in “The Life of Riley.”

The Life of Riley

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