Wabbits-20, Grumpa Joe-1

The Wabbit War took a turn for the better yesterday. Grumpa Joe transformed himself into Jose the illegal grass cutter and mowed the lawn. He dreamt about how to deport all the illegal aliens from his garden. I would let them stay if they would only eat grass, he thought. They insist on steak instead. Over the course of the summer, the Wabbits took out twelve Asiatic lilies, a prize geranium, Sum and Substance hosta, sedum, lobelia, Rose of Sharon sprigs, moonflower, broccoli, brussel sprouts, my Count Dracula day lily, and they killed a huge number of tulips while I was in Arizona. They ate everything but grass. If they ate my grass, and kept it short, I would love them.  Instead, I am spewing CO and CO2 into the atmosphere and contributing to global warming.  I knew it, the damn Wabbits are melting the polar ice cap.

I was nearly half way finished with making stripes in the front lawn when I noticed some fur and guts on the stripe next to me. How did that happen? I ran over a baby “Oh isn’t he cute,” Wabbit. All I can say is that the Wabbit world is better off by not having this stupid genetically defective individual multiplying their kind. Any Wabbit stupid enough to hide in the grass, while Jose the Illegal grass cutter daydreams stripes into the lawn, deserves to be chopped into pieces.

I know, I know. My readership will drop because of my terrible attitude and lack of compassion for the poor. After all, they are only trying to make a better life for themselves. Well, shit happens. The Wabbits are still out scoring me twenty to one.

A Very, Very, Very Sad Song

Play gypsy play! What a sad song you send us from your melancholy strings. A good fifteen percent of the work force is out of work, but our president has the guts to send his family to Spain on a junket. Who is paying for that? I really feel for his finances. He really made me feel like he can relate to the plight of the general population with his tear jerking story of maxed out credit cards, and the struggle to feed a 401K. That has changed dramatically hasn’t it?

Keep paying those taxes America, the liberals aren’t finished spending your money.

The Ugly Faces of Reform

Did I leave anything out? I’m sure I did. Let me know what bothers you about these reforms.

These bandits now have a .666 batting average, are we going to let them make it three out of three?

Loose Lips

In times of war, military secrets leaked to the enemy are acts of TREASON. This week we learned of a massive leak of military information regarding the Afghan and Iraq wars. Did I say war? Yes, Congress declared both as wars. They are wars for everyone except for the Commander in Chief. He thinks they are criminal acts, and is handling them the same way as any murderer or thief. During World War II, any act of treason was punishable by death. Why is Obama handling the raid of information by a foreign organization like WikiLeaks so loosely?

I see a thread of continuity here that is scary. Obama definitely has a laissez-faire attitude about the security of our country. Let me count the ways:  1.) Establish an open border, and allow anyone in who wants to come, even terrorists. 2.) Throw your allies under the bus in favor of your enemies. 3.) Disband the nuclear arsenal. 4.) Allow strangers to crash White House State dinners. 5.) Allow your top general to fraternize with liberal magazine writers. 6.) Allow the Muslims to practice dhimmitude by building a Mosque next to the Twin Towers to show they conquered the USA. 7.) Bow to foreign powers. 8.) Take months to react to a request from your front line general. 9.) Allow known Russian spies to live in the country. 10.) Allow a second-rate computer hackers like WikiLeaks gain access to military information and then dismiss it with a “so what?”

The real question to answer is this: Did WikiLeaks hack into our computers, or, did someone inside our government give them access. If they hacked in, I call it an act of aggression the same as war. If one of our people gave it to them, I call it TREASON.

New Development in the Wabbit War

Image courtesy of Warner Bros, free use agreement.

A new force has mysteriously intervened in the Wabbit War. Striking in the dark of night, the new force has divided the Alliance. Grumpa Joe smilingly approves. The Alliance consisting of Wabbits, Grandma Peggy, birds, squirrels, mice, ants, and the dreaded Heron have suffered a major setback. Still unidentified, the strike force snuck into the garden climbed the window style and stole a bird feeder. In a fit of disappointment, Grandma Peggy directed Grumpa Joe to search for the lost feeder. He spent three hours in the yard mowing and weeding without spotting any evidence of the feeder or its hanger. Meanwhile, the Wabbits continue to eat any new plant sprouting in the flowerbeds. They also continue to enjoy the birdseed that Grandma Peggy now spreads on the patio for the birds. Is it possible that the Wabbits themselves are responsible for this latest act of aggression? Have they allied themselves with the opossum or the raccoons in order to avail themselves of easier food?