Why Grumpa Joe Will Never Be President

Posted on 03/05/2011 by Grumpa Joe

Warning!

This post has graphically visual images which may cause you discomfort.

Politically correct people should change channels immediately.

Do not read if you are squeamish, or a radical muslim sympathizer.

It became a total waste of my time, but I watched anyway. President Obama’s Press Secretary explained how the Navy reverently readied Bin Laden’s body and buried him at sea. I also read several headlines about Muslims unhappy about Bin Laden being buried at sea.

I do not recall any news of a Muslim complaint about how to bury a suicide bomber. Most likely those guys get scrapped off the pavement and walls with a shovel and tossed into a dumpster. No one ever complains. No one writes about a respectful burial for a martyr whose remains are proudly scattered about peaceful markets mixed with the bodies of innocent people who by coincidence are in the martyr’s place of worship. The innocents become collateral damage in a war dedicated to killing in the name of God.

If I were leading the country, I wouldn’t have allowed the navy to deposit Bin Laden’s body into the Arabian Sea in a solemn, ceremonial way. The burial procedure I have in mind would be slightly more public and complicated.

First I would ship Bin Laden’s body to Washington D.C. for a service, worthy of a ruthless criminal, on the Washington Mall. In full view of the White House, Capitol, the Washington, Jefferson, and Lincoln Memorials. I would invite the Imam’s of every Mosque in America to witness the debacle.

There, I  have  a meat grinder of the proportions used by a sausage manufacturer with at least a 100 horsepower motor spinning the blades at 1200 rpm. Six service people who lost limbs in the war on terror would carry Bin Laden’s pathetic dead ass to the hopper and dump him in head first.

Volunteers from families who have lost loved ones in the 9/11 attack or in the Iraq, Afghanistan wars would spread the Bin Laden burger around the grounds of the Mall.

Hidden from view I have several hundred hungry dogs. When the volunteers are safely out of harms way, I release the dogs for a meal of Bin Laden burger.

Finale 1. Once the dogs finish eating the Bin Laden burger we round them up and take them to defecate within the prison cells of Guantanamo.

Finale 2. Once the dogs finish eating the Bin Laden burger we round them up and take them to defecate in Pakistan.

Vote for your favorite. One star  for finale 1, or two stars for finale 2.

This is my proposal, and I’m proud of it.

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A New Playbook For Reporters

Posted on 19/04/2011 by Grumpa Joe

Finally, some of the press is beginning to learn that Obama puts his pants on the same way they do. He doesn’t magically, snap his fingers or wiggle his nose and clothing appears on his body. He is mortal.

In a recent interview by a Texas reporter, Obama was visibly upset by the audacity of the reporter’s method. The guy used the O’Reilly technique of asking a question in the middle of Obama’s standard answers. WFAA Reporter Brad Watson from the Dallas-Fort Worth area held his ground and continued to press for answers Obama was not prepared to answer. Later, Obama chastised the man for interrupting him.

During the 2008 campaign, Obama and his minions controlled the message to the press by feeding them snippets of the campaign script. The press loved it because they didn’t have to use any brain power to think of questions to ask. Could it be that a new generation of reporters, has grown up with the internet and have trained themselves to obtain answers by cutting and pasting with a few button pushes? Have reporters forgotten that direct questions provide real answers? Joe the Plumber was the only one who ever asked Obama a direct question during the 2008 campaign that he answered extemporaneously, and we learned a lot from that response.

A few brave reporters have written a new playbook, and I fully expect to see more courageous writers enter the game. By challenging the president and his administration with serious questions, and insisting the questions not be responded to with pre-rehearsed answers we will begin to see the true Obama emerge as a man who wants to rule the world at our expense.

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Are “We the People” Going to Stand for That?

Posted on 16/04/2011 by Grumpa Joe

According to my dictionary the word slavery defines a person who is the legal property of another and is forced to obey them. When America rebelled against England  in 1776, slavery was legal. Landowners owned slaves. The founders struggled with the concept of keeping slaves while they defined the concept of “all men are created equal.”  Thomas Jefferson originally had words which included slaves in the Declaration of Independence. The southern colonies would not join the union if the declaration included slaves as equals. A long debate ensued and ultimately, the fathers concluded that a strong union of the thirteen colonies was most essential.  Jefferson wrote the last version of the Declaration of Independence as it stands today. The founders were the first to kick the  problem(slavery) down the road; thus setting a precedent for current congressional leaders to do the same with issues like Medicare, Social Security, and Medicaid.

One hundred years later, Abraham Lincoln, founder of the Republican party, finally decided to end the can kicking and abolished slavery. The cost he incurred was huge both in dollars, and in human lives. He believed as did Jefferson (who was reportedly the founder of the Democrat party) that the slaves  must be included in the “all men are created equal,” phrase of the Declaration. Lincoln took a hard stand and signed the Emancipation Proclamation, ending slavery in the USA. He chose to do the right thing and not to kick the can down the road.

I suggest that everyone review the Declaration of Independence. I did, and I if I didn’t know it was the Declaration, I would swear the writer described the same issues we face in our country today. The Declaration is a call to arms and gives the rationale for doing so. Today, citizens of the USA are  divided.  Half are on the side of the government (monarchy) while the other believes in the right to govern themselves. In 1774-76 the colonists made ready for armed revolution to take their country from the King of England. Today, we see a Tea Party who believes as the colonists, i.e. we have the right and moral obligation to govern ourselves. Instead of an armed revolution Tea Party people like myself believe in peaceful use of the existing process to win back the country.

Since Lincoln’s time, our leaders in Washington have invented new philosophies for governing. Some say, that it is the role of Government to take care of the people under the “Welfare” clause of the Constitution. There is a Jefferson quote carved in stone at the Jefferson Memorial in Washington that contradicts the philosophy that we are stupid, and need to be cared for;

“I have sworn upon the altar of God, eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man.”

Thomas Jefferson believed in man’s ability to think and care for himself. We do not  need another man to  Lord over us.

Thomas Jefferson foresaw that  if left unchecked, the government would rebel against the will of the people and revert to tyranny. He truly believed as did his compatriots, that “Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed . . . .”

Obama’s speech this week to the GWU students clearly signaled his intention to stifle any effort by the people to take back their government and reverse exorbitant and  costly social programs.

Are We the People going to stand for that, or  will we allow him to lead us down the road to big government dependency and ultimately become tax-slaves to feed the monster?

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I Call and Raise You a Trillion

Posted on 15/04/2011 by Grumpa Joe

Poker is not one of my games, but I know enough to realize a hand with a low pair will lose to a royal flush.

POTUS is currently handing out his usual campaign rhetoric about Republicans killing granny and we have to tax the rich some more. Throughout his campaign I heard his sorry story about how the Republicans only wanted to hand the voters the same old crap that doesn’t work. It seems the shoe is on his foot now. He is the one spewing the same tired old ideas that don’t work

This week Representative Paul Ryan announced a new plan for cutting spending, saving Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid. At the same time his plan will cut the deficit and balance the budget.

Obama panicked when he saw the plan. The tone of his voice and agressive attack on the plan made it obvious that he feared the young congressman who proposed it. In his panic I’m sure he commanded his advisors to spend another trillion to take the plan apart line by line, word by word like he goes over the budget with his scalpel. He has to destroy this plan or he is a one term president.

My last job as a private sector worker was to create plans.  Most of the projects were to introduce a complete multi-part product line. The work included design and development of the products as well as the plastic molds, automated assembly, and automated packaging involved in production. It is not easy. The first task is to define the goal. Once we set the goal, all the plans centered on achievement. The plan usually took several groups many days, and often weeks to develop. When we finally presented it to upper management, they typically took our timeline and folded it in half. It was never good enough. Most times, however, by working the plan at a feverish pace removing every obstacle in the way of the critical path, we made the original estimate.

Planning is hard, picking on a plan is easy. In Obama’s speech to George Washington University students, he ruthlessly picked apart Paul Ryan’s “Path to American Prosperity.” For some reason, Obama cannot see prosperity as an outcome for anyone but himself. President Obama very arrogantly presented his own plan. It was his generic old campaign BS about cutting the deficit without a single suggestion for how he will do it; not a single specific. Yet, he picked apart a very detailed plan with many specifics. The details are what  make it easy for the criticizer to pick something apart.  There are thousand ways to skin a cat, and one man’s choice of a way to carry out a task may not be another’s.  Yet Obama decided to critique Ryan’s plan without offering a single  alternative. He chose instead to mis-represent the plan with blatant lies intended to scare.

What Obama and his leftist cronies fail to understand is that old guys like myself would be happy to choose their own plan for medical care, just give us the opportunity to do it. Currently, Medicare is not a choice. Medicare has been forced upon us by a government that believes it knows what is best for us, and now that same government is placing blame for the bankrupt system on the people it forced into using it. The new system, or Obama-care, is the new democrat disaster for eliminating a poor plan. With its death panels, the current Obama-care law is the plan that will kill granny, not the Ryan suggestion.

Obama and the entire Liberal world does not have a rats ass clue how to even start on a plan like the one presented this week. Obama’s rhetoric is still the same, i.e. rob from the Capitalist Fats Cats to feed government Fat Cat Bureaucracies. Oh, and trickle a speck down to the poor too.

He has never revealed his goal, except to state that he wants to transform America. Transform it to what?

We the People must insist that the President be called upon to present his specific vision and specific plan for transforming America.

Here is one last thought:  If the president finally succeeds in destroying capitalism, and every single job in America is gone, and all of us depend on the government for life sustenance, who will continue to feed the monster?

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My Gift to Leftist Environmentalists

Posted on 28/03/2011 by Grumpa Joe

I Grumpa Joe of Grumpa Joe’s Place, Frankfort, Illinois being of unsound mind and a horrible memory, revoke all rights to the following idea.

I bequeath to all elite liberal environmentalists who profess to save the planet from destruction by global warming caused by man-made carbon dioxide emission, and who profess to save the USA by withholding exploration and drilling for oil anywhere within the boundaries of the Continental United States in the hopes that said lack of drilling will drive the price of gasoline to ten dollars a gallon, the following patentable concept for a transportation appliance powered by a multitude of energy sources.

I forgo all rights, monies, and residual earnings that may accrue from the sale of these devices.

I also deem that profits generated from this invention be placed into trust for the sole purpose of funding the Obama Golden Parachute.

Diverse Energy Powered Personal Transportation Appliance

DPO Vehicle Specs

Estimated weight 24,000 pounds

Mileage Range

Gas Power-40 miles

Battery- 40 miles

Solar- add 5 miles

Wind- add 10 miles

Lithium Generator- add 101,000 miles

Pedals, 60 miles

Cost

Standard —$100,000.00

With optional Lithium Di-Sulfide Generator and fuel–$1,000,000,000,000.00

With optional rubber tired steel wheels-$110,000.00

Place your orders with Grumpa Joe at grumpajoesplace.com

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