Kick It Into High Gear

Posted on 31/12/2010 by Grumpa Joe

It is time to reflect on the past year and to account for the precious time granted me by the Lord. I struggled with my accomplishment list as I took inventory of what I did. I recalled that during my working years, at the end of a busy day, I often told my staff, “Well, we didn’t get much done today, but we will give it hell tomorrow.” So here goes my advice to myself, “Well Joe, you didn’t get much done in 2010, so give it hell in 2011.”

My accomplishment list is short this year, but the projects were larger. Here is a short list of things I am proud of:

I posted one hundred and seventy-five pieces on my BLOG. Among these posts were fifty-six political cartoons. Some of them were genius, others mediocre.

I wrote two children’s stories and submitted them to publishers: “FLYING TO THE SUN,” and “MOON CAKES TO GO.”  I rewrote a children’s story titled “FIRE FLY AIR FORCE,” for summer, and two Christmas stories, “SANTA IS MISSING, and “THE GIFT,” in time for Christmas.

Peggy and I spent twelve weeks basking in the sunny climes of Arizona while my kids stayed home to shovel snow. We visited cousins and friends in California.

Lion Joe organized and led the STRIDES: Lions Walk for Diabetes Awareness, with a team of really great Lincoln-Way High School teachers, and Lions.

In between those activities, Grumpa Jose  kept the garden in order, and the lawn maintained. This is the first year, I was proud of the green grass in front of our home. While I was tending the front with loving care, the backyard lawn turned  into thistle and chickweed.  Jose also waged a war with the Wabbits and built barriers around his flower beds. The Wabbit wars were documented on the BLOG. Just as the fence along our southern border fails to keep out drug runners, my fences were no match for the Wabbits. It turned out that West Nile virus is a more effective deterrent. While I waited for the virus to kick in, the Wabbits consumed my prize perennials.

In order to keep my sanity during this activity called 2010, I kept calm and chilled by consuming eight cases of red wine. Of all the accomplishments, the wine tasting was my favorite.

Finally, here is some  wisdom for my friends:

I know you didn’t get much done in 2010, so kick it into high gear, and give it hell in 2011.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

Filed under: Biography, Cartoons, children's writers, family, Fire Fly Air Force, Garden, Government, Lions Club, Memories, Santa is Missing, THE GIFT-2010 Edition, Wabbit Wars | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments »

Wabbits-20, Grumpa Joe-1

Posted on 31/07/2010 by Grumpa Joe

The Wabbit War took a turn for the better yesterday. Grumpa Joe transformed himself into Jose the illegal grass cutter and mowed the lawn. He dreamt about how to deport all the illegal aliens from his garden. I would let them stay if they would only eat grass, he thought. They insist on steak instead. Over the course of the summer, the Wabbits took out twelve Asiatic lilies, a prize geranium, Sum and Substance hosta, sedum, lobelia, Rose of Sharon sprigs, moonflower, broccoli, brussel sprouts, my Count Dracula day lily, and they killed a huge number of tulips while I was in Arizona. They ate everything but grass. If they ate my grass, and kept it short, I would love them.  Instead, I am spewing CO and CO2 into the atmosphere and contributing to global warming.  I knew it, the damn Wabbits are melting the polar ice cap.

I was nearly half way finished with making stripes in the front lawn when I noticed some fur and guts on the stripe next to me. How did that happen? I ran over a baby “Oh isn’t he cute,” Wabbit. All I can say is that the Wabbit world is better off by not having this stupid genetically defective individual multiplying their kind. Any Wabbit stupid enough to hide in the grass, while Jose the Illegal grass cutter daydreams stripes into the lawn, deserves to be chopped into pieces.

I know, I know. My readership will drop because of my terrible attitude and lack of compassion for the poor. After all, they are only trying to make a better life for themselves. Well, shit happens. The Wabbits are still out scoring me twenty to one.

Filed under: Cartoons, Garden, Gardening, Hobbies, Wabbit Wars | Tagged: , , , | 3 Comments »

New Development in the Wabbit War

Posted on 26/07/2010 by Grumpa Joe

Image courtesy of Warner Bros, free use agreement.

A new force has mysteriously intervened in the Wabbit War. Striking in the dark of night, the new force has divided the Alliance. Grumpa Joe smilingly approves. The Alliance consisting of Wabbits, Grandma Peggy, birds, squirrels, mice, ants, and the dreaded Heron have suffered a major setback. Still unidentified, the strike force snuck into the garden climbed the window style and stole a bird feeder. In a fit of disappointment, Grandma Peggy directed Grumpa Joe to search for the lost feeder. He spent three hours in the yard mowing and weeding without spotting any evidence of the feeder or its hanger. Meanwhile, the Wabbits continue to eat any new plant sprouting in the flowerbeds. They also continue to enjoy the birdseed that Grandma Peggy now spreads on the patio for the birds. Is it possible that the Wabbits themselves are responsible for this latest act of aggression? Have they allied themselves with the opossum or the raccoons in order to avail themselves of easier food?

Filed under: conservatives, Cooking, family, Fish, Garden,pond,, Hot Rods, Society | Tagged: , , , | 1 Comment »

Wabbit War Update

Posted on 29/06/2010 by Grumpa Joe

The Alliance grows stronger in both members and resolve.  Today, awestruck sympathizers reached a new high as they proclaimed, “awe, isn’t he cute?”

As the actor William Bendix often said in the radio sitcom The Life of Riley, “it’s a losin’ fight.”

Meanwhile, Grumpa Joe sent S.O.S. messages to the Predator World requesting emergency assistance.

Filed under: family, Garden, Gardening, Warm and Fuzzy | Tagged: , , , , , | 3 Comments »

Day Two of Wabbit War

Posted on 16/06/2010 by Grumpa Joe

Stargazer Lilly

Yesterday, I wrote about my experience with Elmer Fudd and the wabbits in my yard. Today, I glumly report that the only one being impeded by the wabbit barrier is Grumpa Joe. The critters make a straight beeline for cover and slip right under the fence.

 I fixed the problem on my raised vegetable bed by stapling the wire to the base. The fence around my flower beds will require a more engineered approach. All through this fence building effort, I had one last Asiatic lily bud about to bloom. Perhaps it was a show of nose thumbing, but the last lily bud has been nipped and is lying on the ground.

In the meantime, Peggy has kicked up her protective instincts another notch and is running interference for the wabbits.

I will prevail even if it takes chemical warfare to win.

Filed under: Garden, Gardening, Hobbies | Tagged: , , | 2 Comments »

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