It was my practice to acknowledge contributors, but since the NSA is collecting our every keystroke and spying on us, I cannot tell you that this funny came from my cousin Sharon in California. Did ya get that NSA?
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Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another ‘EconomicStimulus’ payment.
This is indeed a very exciting program, and I’ll explain it by using a Q & A format:
Q. What is an ‘Economic Stimulus’ payment ?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.
Q.. Where will the government get this money ?
Q. So the government is giving me back my own money ?
Q. What is the purpose of this payment ?
A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.
Q. But isn’t that stimulating the economy of China ?
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. Economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:
* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China or Sri Lanka .
* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.
* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India , Taiwan or China .
* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico ,Honduras and Guatemala ..
* If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea .
* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan .
* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.
Instead, keep the money in America by:
1) Spending it at yard sales, or
2) Going to ball games, or
3) Spending it on prostitutes,
(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. )
Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day !
No need to thank me, I’m just glad I could be of help.
Filed under: Government, Humor | Tagged: Big Brother, California, China, Economy of the United States, High-definition television, Honduras, NSA, Spy, Sri Lanka, Stimulus, Taiwan | 2 Comments »
