No Luck At All

This is my new neighbor…

image001

She’s single…

She lives right across the road.

I can see her place from my yard.

I watched as she got home from work this evening.

I was surprised when she walked across the
Street and up my driveway and
Knocked on my door.

I rushed to open it, she looks at me and says,
“I just got home, and I am so horny! I have
This strong urge to have a good
Time, get drunk, and make love all night long!
Are you busy tonight?”

I quickly replied, “Nope, I’m Free,
and I have no plans at all!”

She said, “Great! Could you

watch my dog?”


Being a senior citizen really sucks!

 

Political Musings

English: Headstone (front and back) of Adlai E...

English: Headstone (front and back) of Adlai Eewing Stevenson II. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

English: Democratic party poster 1952 for Adla...

English: Democratic party poster 1952 for Adlai Stevenson. never copyrighted; no (c) symbol (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Note the campaign poster comparison between the Republican and Democrat challengers, the message has still not changed nor have the outcomes, the country is still a mess.

This morning while I wait for my bride to get ready for a road trip I am reading e-mails and have some really great ones to share with you. My favorite quote is by Adlai Stevenson, the last great Governor of  Illinois. Aesop wins the most lasting quote award, true in BC and still true today.

 If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.

~Jay Leno~
The problem with political jokes is they get elected.
~Henry Cate, VII~
We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.
~Aesop~
If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these State of the Union speeches, there wouldn’t be any inducement to go to heaven.
~Will Rogers~
Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.
~Nikita Khrushchev~
When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I’m beginning to believe it.
~Clarence Darrow~
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you.
~Author unknown~
Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel.
~John Quinton~
Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other.
~Oscar Ameringer~
  ;
I offer my opponents a bargain: if they will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them.
~Adlai Stevenson, campaign speech, 1952~
A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.
~ Tex Guinan~
I have come to the conclusion that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.
~Charles de Gaulle~
Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.
~Doug Larson~
There ought to be one day — just one — when there is open season on senators.
~Will Rogers~