A Universe of Laws

Gravity

Gravity (Photo credit: eat more toast)

A very good engineer friend sent me this and I had to share.

Law of Mechanical Repair –After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you’ll have to pee.

 

Law of Gravity – Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

 

Law of Probability- The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

 

Law of Random Numbers – If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.

 

Variation Law –If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

 

Law of the Bath – When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

 

Law of Close Encounters – The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don’t want to be seen with.

 

Law of the Result – When you try to prove to someone that a machine won’t work, it will.

 

Law of Biomechanics – The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

 

Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena – At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.

 

The Coffee Law – As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

 

Murphy’s Law of Lockers – If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

 

Law of Physical Surfaces – The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

 

Law of Logical Argument- Anything is possible if you don’t know what you are talking about.

 

Brown’s Law of Physical Appearance – If the clothes fit, they’re ugly.

 

Oliver’s Law of Public Speaking – A closed mouth gathers no feet.

 

Wilson’s Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy –As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

 

Doctors’ Law – If you don’t feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you’ll feel better.. But don’t make an appointment, and you’ll stay sick.

5 Responses

  1. So True!!! Enjoyed this, thanks.

  2. As good a compliation as I have ever seen. A couple of suggested additions:
    – In a business meeting, when you know the answer, the question will not be asked. And vice versa.
    – when you have enough time to reach your destination, you will find the roads free of traffic, and lights magically turning green as you approach.

  3. Murphy’s Law. Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.

Comments are closed.

Tracey J Boothe Publishing Blog

Nature, books, exploring, publishing, photography, video, short films, lifestyle

Jim Campbell's

"Inside Every Progressive Is A Totalitarian Screaming To Get Out"

Wavy and Anchored

The waves may come crashing down, but they will not break me.

Journeyman's Journal

This is a journal of the art of woodworking by hand

KetoJENic Vibe

🥓🥑🍳 Health and Wellness based, Easy Recipes, and Keto Product Reviews

Quotes Database

Your Site Of Influential Quotes!

The Lockdown Chef

A cooking survival guide for those who don't know how

My Serene Words

Seeking Solace in the horizon of life & beyond

MRS. T’S CORNER

https://www.tangietwoods

ESL Ventures

Teach ESL and Travel the World

Heart Felt

This platform is for the people who likes to talk straight from the heart🤩

THOUGHTS OF PESHY

on personal experiences and things I'm passionate about

Suzette B's Blog

Inspiration and Spirituality **Award Free**

Bhutadarma

Nothing is impossible (at least that does not violate the laws of physics). When you can..violate the laws of physics!

I Know I Made You Smile

cartoons/humor/fiction/nonfiction

galesmind

Come take a journey through my mind

Nutsrok

The humor and humanity of storytelling.

%d bloggers like this: