Positive Imaging

What to talk about today? The sky is cloudy and rain is imminent. There are still too many weeds to pull in the garden, but I’m not into it. My attitude is dreadfully morose. That condition requires me to work overtime to eliminate. How? By prayer, and huge doses of mindless work of some kind, like writing a post for my blog.

My life which was filled with the activity of caring for my late wife, and has become empty. The virus has cooled my second passion after Peggy, the Lions Club, and I am very down about the members not showing any interest in revving up the juices to serve the community. Many of our members are my age and some older, so they are afraid of their shadow and are hunkered down. I still think I act and feel twenty years younger than the average aged 62 year old in our club. Just yesterday, I attended an online Zoom webinar on virtual fund raising. I was amazed by the activity presented by a newly formed club during the pandemic. They chartered as a virtual club, meaning they don’t meet in person. All of their communication and activities are done using eMail, Messaging, Zoom, Facebook, Youtube, and other social media platforms. They collect money using apps like Go Fund Me and PayPal. Their projects, what ever they are, require fund raising. I have often thought that lots of activities that require fund raising for each one is a smarter way to keep club members engaged and active. The one giant fund raiser of the year approach which our club evolved into requires a huge effort during the fund raising process which wears everyone out for further activity. In the meantime members leave because there is not a lot of activity for them to participate in to bring service to the town, and which gives them a feeling of “giving back”.

Another habit or culture that our aged club has evolved into is to write checks to help causes within the town, this is a good thing. What is bad about it is that the causes are determined by a very limited number of people who decide behind closed doors how much should be donated, and who will get it. The list of charities is then presented to the regular membership for approval. That vote for approval is the only action a person gets to make him feel he is giving back to the community. On the opposite side of this process is the scheme which has members bringing project ideas to the services committee for approval and then they organize into a team to raise funds to bring the idea to fruition. This method gets more members directly involved with the implementation of the service. It all sounds good on paper. The downside is that our culture at this point works against such a system. The one big project for the year system seems to shade out any new activity. It’s kind of like trying to present an idea to Congress who will discuss, debate, present to committee, and maybe vote to bring it into law. Nothing happens fast. In our world today the key words are fast, action, team, solution, next!

Above I stated that I think younger than the average person in the club even though I am in the upper quartile of senior members. I must learn how to present ideas to the hipsters because my ideas don’t gather any interest for action by the young crowd. For them these things all sound like a dirty four letter word spelled W-O-R-K. If they can’t push a button or get it done on a keyboard it isn’t for them to do. That is what frustrates the hell out of me. I can get more done using those tools even though I am a dinosaur pushing the keys and thinking outside the box. All I can do is to continue to push ideas into their brains and hope these thoughts break through the blood-brain-barrier. In the mean time I will remain despondent about my ability to lead this club forward.

Now, I have to take a long walk to build a pile of endorphins, and follow it up with a mediative trance during which I will envision myself making a ground breaking positive presentation that will cause members to line up with ideas and a desire to serve.

A Universe of Laws

Gravity

Gravity (Photo credit: eat more toast)

A very good engineer friend sent me this and I had to share.

Law of Mechanical Repair –After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you’ll have to pee.

 

Law of Gravity – Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

 

Law of Probability- The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

 

Law of Random Numbers – If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.

 

Variation Law –If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

 

Law of the Bath – When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

 

Law of Close Encounters – The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don’t want to be seen with.

 

Law of the Result – When you try to prove to someone that a machine won’t work, it will.

 

Law of Biomechanics – The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

 

Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena – At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.

 

The Coffee Law – As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

 

Murphy’s Law of Lockers – If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

 

Law of Physical Surfaces – The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

 

Law of Logical Argument- Anything is possible if you don’t know what you are talking about.

 

Brown’s Law of Physical Appearance – If the clothes fit, they’re ugly.

 

Oliver’s Law of Public Speaking – A closed mouth gathers no feet.

 

Wilson’s Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy –As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

 

Doctors’ Law – If you don’t feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you’ll feel better.. But don’t make an appointment, and you’ll stay sick.

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