The Secret Is To Stay Positive

Pete Souza, Official White House Photographer

Pete Souza, Official White House Photographer (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

This true story is from my yarn telling, bike ridin’ buddy Lou who now lives, and fraternizes with the group in this story.

 

 

 

President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his telephone rang.”Hello, President Obama” a heavily accented southern voice said. “This is Jimmy Boy, down here at Bump’s Catfish Shack, in Vicksburg , and I am callin’ to tell ya’ll that we are officially declaring war on y’all!”

 

“Well Jimmy Boy,” Barack replied, “This is indeed important news! How big is your army?”

 

“Right now,” said Jimmy Boy, after a moments calculation “there is myself, my cousin Tom, my next-door-neighbor, and brother Gerald, and the whole dart team from JD’s Bait Shop. That makes eight or maybe nine depending if Bump can close the store.”

 

Barack paused. “I must tell you Jimmy Boy that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command.”

 

“Wow,” said Jimmy Boy. “I’ll have to call ya back!”

 

Sure enough, the next day, Jimmy Boy called again. “Mr. Obama, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!”

 

“And what equipment would that be Jimmy Boy?” Barack asked.

 

“Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and my brother Mike’s farm tractor.”

 

President Obama sighed. “I must tell you Jimmy Boy, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also I’ve increased my army to one and a half million since we last spoke.”

 

“Lord above”, said Jimmy Boy, “I’ll be getting back to ya.”

 

Sure enough, Jimmy Boy called again the next day. “President Obama! I am sorry to have to tell you that we have had to call off this here war.”

 

“I’m sorry to hear that” said Barack. “Why the sudden change of heart?”

 

Well, sir,” said Jimmy Boy, “we’ve all sat ourselves down and had a long chat over sweet tea, catfish, greens, and pie, and come to realize that there’s just no way we can feed that many prisoners.”

 

SOUTHERN CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN

 

We Want to Strike “Terror!”

Nancy Pelosi, Third in Line for the Presidency

Dear Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi;

Barack Obama spent seven hundred and fifty million dollars to win the election to become president of the United States of America. I have to believe he had a few high end supporters to accomplish that kind of fund raising.  Do the names  Kennedy, and Soros strike a bell? How about Jeffery Immelt, or Jeffery Zucker? Are these men ordinary low end citizens? Better yet, how about Nancy Pelosi and her husband, the beneficiaries of many “earmarks,” and perks that are above the call of the ordinary citizen?

The Tea Parties had zero funding.

Here is the message we of the Tea Parties are sending to you. We want to strike your soul with the “TERROR” of a backlash vote!

Bhutadarma

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