Just Who Is the Traitor?

I just got this today. I am laughing my ass off. The liberals will brand this as fake news.

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Hmmmmm…

Let me see if I got this straight….
If we get nuked by missiles from North Korea,
it’ll be by missiles built with technology given to China by Bill Clinton,
funded by Iran with money Obama gave them,

with warheads developed from uranium sold to Russia by Hillary
and refined by Iran into weapons-grade plutonium in Russian centrifuges

bought with money Obama gave them.

And Trump’s trying to undo this shit storm…but he’s the Traitor!

Short Term History Lesson

This essay by Victor Davis Hanson is a comprehensive compilation of actions being taken by Liberals, Never Trumpers, and good old regular republicans against Trump. Hanson exposes the hypocrisy of the Left by listing Obama’s law bending actions many of which are unconstitutional. In short this is a great piece of history.

Regime Change by Any Other Name?

by Victor Davis Hanson May 22, 2017 10:08 PM @vdhanson

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Truth or consequences? Obama skated for far worse misdeeds.

Election machines in three states were not hacked to give Donald Trump the election.

There was never a serious post-election movement of electors to defy their constitutional duties and vote for Hillary Clinton.

Nor, once Trump was elected, did transgendered people begin killing themselves in alarming numbers.

Nor were there mass resignations at the State Department upon his inauguration.

Nor did Donald Trump seek an order to “ban all Muslims” from entering the U.S. Instead, he temporarily sought a suspension in visas for everyone, regardless of religion, from seven Middle Eastern states that the Obama administration had earlier identified as incapable of properly vetting travelers to the U.S.

The first lady did not work for an elite escort or prostitute service. She never said that she and young Barron Trump would not be moving to the White House. Barron does not have autism.

Trump’s father never ran racist ads as a supposed candidate in a purported political campaign. Kellyanne Conway denies that in a private conversation between segments on MSNBC, she privately remarked to hosts that she had to take a shower after working for Trump.

Donald Trump never suggested to the Mexican president that the U.S. was going to invade Mexico. Nor did Trump plan to mobilize the National Guard to send back illegal aliens.

He did not remove a Martin Luther King bust from the White House.

There was no evidence that he ever promised to ease Russian sanctions (much less that he promised the Russians he would be “flexible” after he was elected). He did not short the FBI of resources to conduct an investigation into supposed Russian collusion. He did not go to Moscow and watch prostitutes in his bed urinate where Barack Obama had previously slept.

His deputy attorney general did not threaten to resign over the Comey firing.

And we have no idea whether Trump really gets two scoops of ice cream while limiting his guests to one, or pads around in a bathrobe in the early evening, or cannot find the light switch in the White house.

Yet all that is what daily we hear and read.

Meanwhile . . .

Fake news crowds out real news. Here is what we do not read much about: North Korea, long appeased, could well send missiles against our allies, perhaps even with nuclear payloads. Afghanistan is at a crux and will either implode or need more American troops. China’s role is in the balance, and it may or may not help defang North Korea. The greatest tax- and health-reform packages in years are now in the hands of Congress. Executive orders have revolutionized the domestic energy industry and achieved a stunning and historic reduction in illegal immigration. The stock market is soaring, employment is up, and confidence in the economy has returned. Wall Street seems to dip only on talk of impeaching Donald Trump.

Commensurate Worry?

And here is what no longer troubles us at all. In 2008, candidate Barack Obama used back channels to communicate flexibility to the Iranians (as in the later assurance he gave, on a hot mic, to the Russians), which may have helped undermine the ongoing Bush-administration negotiations with Iran.

Hillary Clinton set up an illegal server, distributed classified information in an illegal and unsecured fashion, lied about it, and destroyed thousands of e-mails central to an investigation — and got off without an indictment.

In the 2016 election, the head of the DNC conspired to massage the debates and help swing the nomination to the Clinton campaign.

The prior attorney general of the United State met with the spouse of a presidential candidate under investigation, in a stealthy conversation on an airport tarmac, did not inform officials of that meeting until the get-together was discovered by a reporter, semi-recused herself under pressure only to turn over her prosecutorial discretion to the head of the FBI, in a fashion that was both improper and perhaps unconstitutional.

We do not hear how exactly Russian interests at Uranium One obtained market control over 20 percent of U.S. uranium holdings, or the connections between Uranium One and their prior multimillion-dollar donations to the Clinton Foundation, or that the Podesta Group had numerous financial dealings with Russian interests, or that Bill Clinton received $500,000 in 2010 from Russian oligarchic interests while his wife was secretary of state — ten times more than what Michael Flynn was alleged to have received.

We know now that many of the elements of the Iran Deal, the most important foreign-policy decision in the last 20 years, were designed to circumvent Senate ratification and hinged on secret ancillary agreements.

We know that unnamed intelligence officials during the Obama administration surveilled likely political opponents, unmasked their identities, leaked them to the press, either under the assumption that such skullduggery would not surface, or on the pretext that such monitoring was ordinary and involved national security.

We know that Obama’s director of National Intelligence lied under oath to Congress without ramifications. We know that a high IRS official subverted her duties for political purposes in a manner intended to alter the 2012 campaign, took the Fifth Amendment, refuses to testify further before Congress, and faces no consequences other than a plush, taxpayer-funded retirement.

Trump Agonistes

Of course, a media-targeted Donald Trump is weaponizing his enemies by his characteristic blunderbuss approach in interviews. Of course, in anger and without political experience, he tweets too much and says things better left unsaid. Of course, at 70, he has an in-your-face character that is unlike any other president’s and also unlikely to change. He mixes freely truth, rumor, and innuendo.

And of course his superb appointments and Reaganesque approach to foreign affairs, energy production, tax reform, and deregulation are all threatened by his own team’s inability to deal with a dishonest and largely corrupt Washington and New York media.

So Trump boasted and talked trash with the Russians? Terrible and stupid, no doubt. Worse than what Franklin Roosevelt communicated to Winston Churchill about the mass-murdering Stalin? (“I tell you that I think I can personally handle Stalin better than either your Foreign Office or my State Department. Stalin hates the guts of all your top people. He thinks, he likes me better, and I hope he will continue to do so.”) Was Trump more Machiavellian than was Obama, with his “it’s important for him to give me space” requests to Vladimir Putin when he met President Medvedev before the 2012 election and apparently banked his reset policy on his ability to get away with misinforming the public?

All that said, none of the above is a reason to impeach, or remove on medical grounds, an elected president, or to suggest that he resign less than four months into office. Yet we hear exactly that not only from the progressive, in-the-street Left, but from many of the Never Trump Right.

In some sense, we are watching a sort of mass hysteria characteristic of pet-rock or hula-hoop democracy. (It reminds one not so much of the mob that went after Socrates –Trump is no Socrates — but of the mad fury of the French Revolution or the high-water point of the 1950s John Birch movement)

The ‘Resistance’

The “Resistance” peddled the yarn that the election tabulations were electronically rigged; then it was an appeal to electors not to do their constitutional duties; then it was reduced to street theater and demonstrations; then it turned to desperate deep-state leaks and media blitzes; now it’s mere hysteria.

The effort to remove the president is conducted by the New York Times, the Washington Post, the wire services, and the major networks. And we have seen nothing like it in our time. In the last six months, Americans have been told quite falsely so many untruths about the Trump administration by their news agencies that for all practical purposes, there is no such thing as a media as we once knew it.

Journalists are not shy about their prejudices. In some cases — James Rutenberg, Jorge Ramos, and Christiane Amanpour — they have admitted their view that the duty of the new media in the era of Trump is not to stay disinterested, but to become political opponents. Some have been exposed as colluding with Hillary Clinton’s campaign in an effort to prevent Trump’s election victory; they tried to keep those efforts secret because they knew what they were doing was unethical and self-interested.

A second effort to achieve a Trump removal is conducted by pop-culture celebrities — who make the Dixie Chicks’ anti-Bush furor of 2003 now look mild. This opposition is waged in a way that would have ruined careers if directed at Barack Obama.

Madonna dreams on Inauguration Day of blowing up the White House. Don Cheadle wanted Trump to die in grease fire. Snoop Dogg videotapes his mock execution of a Trump lookalike. Martha Stewart poses flipping the finger to a picture of Trump while flashing the Victory sign to a photo of the felon and former pimp Snoop Dogg. Icon Robert De Niro said eloquently of Trump: “He’s a punk, he’s a dog, he’s a pig, he’s a con, he’s a bullsh** artist.”

The efforts to demonize and thus delegitimize and so emasculate Trump have reached sick new heights.

On cable television, Bill Maher jokes that Trump’s daughter fellates her father; on national television, Steven Colbert laughs that Trump fellates Vladimir Putin. Mutatis mutandis: Both would have been fired for suggesting the same about the Obama first family.

Ad nauseam Trump is compared to Hitler by the likes of Ashley Judd and Chris Matthews. Hillary Clinton announces she is part of the “Resistance,” a reference supposedly to the French maquis who sought to ambush Vichy officials and SS patrols during the Nazi occupation of France.

The Democratic party — now bereft of political control in most state legislatures and governorships, as well as in the Senate, the House, the presidency and the Supreme Court — has modeled its opposition on 1960s street theater. More than 60 congressional representatives refused to go to the Inauguration. Some call for Trump’s impeachment; others refuse to hold hearings, block nomination appointments, and demand special prosecutors. The California head of the party leads group chants of “F*** Trump” with extended middle fingers.

The Never Trump right has gone from criticism to outright hysteria and is now calling for impeachment or removal on medical incapacity. The subtext of these latest demands is that a Mike Pence — a wonderful man who did not run for president and would never have been elected if he had run — might assume the presidency and return the Republican party to its former supposedly sober and judicious custodians who, after the proper catharsis, might resume their Washington–New York stewardship of the GOP. For these Trump critics, a defeat along the lines of 2008 and 2016 is far preferable to a 2016 victory. Being praised for being good losers is always preferable to being ostracized for being poor winners.

The Obama Standard

I thought — and so wrote — that Barack Obama subverted the Constitution when he refused to enforce federal laws concerning the ACA mandate, illegal immigration, and contractual provisions of the Chrysler bankruptcy.

I felt Obama, as a candidate and a president-elect, was unethically signaling both the Russians and the Iranians through back channels that he would soon be flexible, even as George Bush was conducting foreign policy as our president.

I thought President Obama had no constitutional right to strong-arm Boeing, the Little Sisters of the Poor, or the small Gibson Guitar company. His administration flat-out lied about the Benghazi catastrophe, the Bowe Bergdahl swap, the Iran Deal, and the chemical-weapons depots of Bashar al-Assad.

The Obama administration endangered U.S. security by yanking peacekeepers out of Iraq for a cheap campaign talking point, by destroying Libya without a follow-up plan, by setting faux red lines and deadlines, by allowing China to create an artificial island base to adjudicate trans-Pacific sea traffic, by appeasing and resetting relations with Vladimir Putin, and by turning a blind eye to North Korean stepped-up aggression. When the president of the United States promises the Russians that he will be more flexible after an election, the message is that he soon plans to do things that, if known, would likely cost him a victory with the American voters.

Obama high-fived the bin Laden raid to the extent of revealing classified protocols and turning over to pet reporters and Hollywood filmmakers some of the trove of bin Laden’s al-Qaeda communications, in hopes of advancing party-line narratives.

His administration helped ruin the reputations of the IRS and the VA. His DOJ went after an obscure video maker and the journalist Dinesh D’Souza largely for reasons of political reprisal and deterrence. His team ordered illegal surveillance of AP reporters and Fox News’s James Rosen; it may well have surveilled and unmasked political opponents and leaked their names to the media.

Obama invited a felon with a parole ankle bracelet into the White House and praised a visiting rapper whose latest album cover celebrated the murder of a white judge, whose corpse was being toasted over by rappers.

Obama was degreed but not educated; he could not pronounce “corpsmen,” had no idea how many states there were in the Union, and thought Hawaii was in Asia and the Falklands Islands off the coast of India. The media demurred — based in some cases on the finery of Obama’s pants crease or his rhetorical ability to cause electrical sensations in one’s leg — and announced him a god, the smartest president ever to enter office. Obama himself in 2008 buffoonishly announced his power to lower global temperatures and the seas, and declared himself more adroit than all his own political handlers and aides in all of their respective jobs.

Obama’s deputy national-security adviser admitted that the administration had misled the press on the Iran Deal by creating an artificial “echo chamber” among media naïfs. Obama’s comments about Trayvon Martin and the Skip Gates affair were incendiary and in line with his campaign smears about the clingers or his calls to supporters to take a gun to a knife fight and “get in their face.”

And yet, for all that and more, Barack Obama certainly did not warrant articles of impeachment; he was not unhinged, nor did he offer any evidence of medical incapacity. He would not deserve to have his family smeared with jokes about incest or autism. Any Madonna-like talk of blowing him up in the White House would have been obscene, perhaps illegal, and probably grounds for prosecution.

We are now watching insidious regime change, aimed at removing the president of the United States not because of what he has done so far, but because of his personality and what he might do to the Obama agenda — and because for a variety of cultural reasons, our elite simply despises his very being.

Read more at: http://www.nationalreview.com/article/447864/trump-critics-left-right-want-him-removed

PSA-160826-Remember These

Lest we forget…

If you’re over 35, you lived through it, so read it and recollect. Amazing to me how much I had forgotten!
For those under 35, read this, verify and don’t forget.
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When Bill Clinton was president, he allowed Hillary to assume authority over an attempt to health care reform. Even after threats and intimidation, she couldn’t get a vote in a Democrat controlled US Congress. This fiasco cost the American taxpayers about $13 million for studies, promotion, and other efforts.

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Then, President Clinton gave Hillary authority over selecting a female attorney general. Her first two selections were Zoe Baird and Kimba Wood – both were forced to withdraw their names from consideration.

Next, she chose Janet Reno – husband Bill described her selection as “my worst mistake.”

Some may not remember that Reno made the decision to gas David Koresh and the Branch Davidian religious sect in Waco, Texas resulting in dozens of deaths of women and children.

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Husband Bill allowed Hillary to make recommendations for the head of the Civil Rights Commission. Lani Guanier was her selection. When a little probing led to the discovery of Ms. Guanier’s radical views, her name had to be withdrawn from consideration.

Apparently a slow learner, husband Bill allowed Hillary to make some more recommendations. She chose former law partners Web Hubbel for the Justice Department, Vince Foster for the White House staff, and William Kennedy for the Treasury Department.

Her selections went well: Hubbel went to prison, Foster (presumably) committed suicide, and Kennedy was forced to resign.

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Many younger voters will have no knowledge of “Travelgate.” Hillary wanted to award unfettered travel contracts to Clinton friend Harry Thompson – and the White House Travel Office refused to comply. She managed to have them reported to the FBI and fired. This ruined their reputations, cost them their jobs, and caused a thirty-six month investigation. Only one employee, Billy Dale was charged with a crime, and that of the enormous crime of mixing personal and White House funds. A jury acquitted him of any crime in less than two hours.

Still not convinced of her ineptness, Hillary was allowed to recommend a close Clinton friend, Craig Livingstone, for the position of Director of White House security. When Livingstone was investigated for the improper access of about 900 FBI files of Clinton enemies (Filegate) and the widespread use of drugs by White House staff, suddenly Hillary and the president denied even knowing Livingstone, and of course, denied knowledge of drug use in the White House.

Following this debacle, the FBI closed its White House Liaison Office after more than thirty years of service to seven presidents.

Next, when women started coming forward with allegations of sexual harassment and rape by Bill Clinton, Hillary was put in charge of the “bimbo eruption” and scandal defense. Some of her more notable decisions in the debacle were:

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She urged her husband not to settle the Paula Jones lawsuit. After the Starr investigation they settled with Ms. Jones.

She refused to release the Whitewater documents, which led to the appointment of Ken Starr as Special Prosecutor.

After $80 million dollars of taxpayer money was spent, Starr’s investigation led to Monica Lewinsky, which led to Bill lying about and later admitting his affairs. Hillary’s devious game plan resulted in Bill losing his license to practice law for ‘lying under oath’ to a grand jury and then his subsequent impeachment by the House of Representatives.

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Hillary avoided indictment for perjury and obstruction of justice during the Starr investigation by repeating, “I do not recall,” “I have no recollection,” and “I don’t know” a total of 56 times while under oath.

After leaving the White House, Hillary was forced to return an estimated $200,000 in White House furniture, china, and artwork that she had stolen.

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What a swell person – ready for another four or eight years of this low-life fool?

Now we are exposed to the unsecure keeping and attempted destruction of beyond Top Secret emails while Hillary was US Secretary of State and the “pay to play” schemes of the Clinton Foundation. What “shoe will fall” next?

But to her loyal fans: “What difference does it make?”

Electing Hillary Clinton president would be like granting Satan absolution and giving him the keys to heaven!

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Please pass this on. Our way of life depends upon it.

Our Political Parties Have Flipped

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All through my childhood(1938-1952) my Dad told me that the Democrat Party was for the working man. He said that because during the depression President Roosevelt continuously invented new  programs to create jobs. In the process he socialized the country with some pretty huge bureaucratic agencies that we are still stuck with today.

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The SECURITIES AND EXCHANGE COMMISSION (SEC) was created to serve as a watchdog on the stock market.

The FEDERAL HOUSING AUTHORITY (FHA) provided low interest loans for new home construction. The HOME OWNERS LOAN CORPORATION (HOLC) allowed homeowners to refinance mortgages to prevent foreclosure or to make home improvements.

The UNITED STATES HOUSING AUTHORITY (USHA) initiated the idea of government-owned low-income housing projects.

The PUBLIC WORKS ADMINISTRATION (PWA) created thousands of jobs by authorizing the building of roads, bridges, and dams.

The NATIONAL YOUTH ADMINISTRATION (NYA) provided college students with work-study jobs.

The NATIONAL LABOR RELATIONS BOARD (NLRB) was designed to protect the right of collective bargaining and to serve as a liaison between deadlock industrial and labor organizations.

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My Dad wouldn’t let go of the line that Roosevelt is for the working people. As I listened to Donald Trump’s acceptance speech this week Dad’s words kept rolling through my mind. There was a part of Trump’s speech that sounded more Democratic than Republican. Here are a few excerpts:

“I have a different vision for our workers. It begins with a new, fair trade policy that protects our jobs  . . .”

“I am going to bring our jobs back our jobs to Ohio and Pennsylvania and New York and Michigan and all of America and I am not going to let companies move to other countries, firing their employees along the way, without consequences.. . . ”

“I pledge to never sign any trade agreement that hurts our workers . . .”

“My opponent, on the other hand, wants to put the great miners and steelworkers of our country out of work and out of business. That will never happen with Donald J Trump as president. Our steelworkers and are miners are going back to work again.”

These quotes sure sound a little democratic to me.

“So what?” I asked myself, so he is for the working people. At this point in time, he is dead right. America has lost millions of jobs to China, Mexico, Costa Rica, Singapore, Viet Nam, South Korea, Japan. You name any country, and most likely we have exported jobs there. This has resulted in the largest re-distribution of wealth in the history of the world, that is until Obama started. All of the wealth has come from the middle class.  Why did we give all those jobs away? It was because of high labor costs.  In my  opinion it was the result of labor unions refusing to understand the need for business to profit. They became too greedy, and obnoxious during their negotiations.

Lately, all I hear about is how Hillary is taking big money for her speeches which she delivers to countries, banks, and big businesses. She won’t even release the transcripts of her speeches so we the little guy can learn from her high priced wisdom. In years past, the Republicans were always the ones who supported big business.

What has happened to the political parties in our country? They seem to have flipped in their philosophies. With the middle class shrunk to near zero, the democrats had to re-invent themselves in order to survive. Bill Clinton has set an example that I’m sure Obama will follow. Clinton invented a money laundering scheme which he calls a charity, and is living higher than he did as president.  Thankfully, Trump has solidly embraced the working man over the lobbiest-world of campaign contributions.

We the people have finally recognized this phenomenon, and are in the process of correcting it. On the other hand the democrats have learned to love the benefits of really big money coming their way. They are no longer satisfied with We the People except for their votes. As soon as they are elected they forget all about the little guy. While  Republicans have always supported the money, they seem to be drunk on campaign contributions and a super easy job as Senator or Congressman. They also forget about us after we elect them.

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What we need is a clean slate filled with honest people who want to serve the country. The Constitution won’t allow us a clean sweep. By design the Founders deliberately set up the system to enable a smooth flow of government without an overload of new talent that could endanger the country. What they failed to realize is that the Congress would make their positions a career and that there is an overload of people who have been in office much too long. A Congressional Convention will be necessary to revise the Constitution to add term limits. If the US Congress is anything like the Illinois House they will reject term limits every time it comes up. Why would they vote on a proposal to lose a high paid cushy job?

So what do we do next? Let me know your ideas in the comment section below.

 

 

Potpourri

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For car enthusiasts who have daughters…………

The daughter asks her Dad, “Dad there is something that my boyfriend said to me, that I didn’t understand. He said that I have a beautiful chassis, lovely airbags and a fantastic bumper.”
Her Dad said, “You tell your boyfriend that if he opens your hood and tries to check your oil with his dipstick , I will tighten his nuts so hard that his headlights will pop out, and he will start leaking out of his exhaust pipe.”

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Just Think –
If Trump wins the election it’ll be the first time in history that a billionaire moved into public housing vacated by a black family!

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A Little Clinton Humor

It doesn’t matter what party you belong to – this is good natured political
humor from a show on Canadian TV, where a black comedian said he
misses Bill Clinton.

“Yep, that’s right – I miss Bill Clinton! He was the closest thing we ever
got to having a real black man as President.”

*He played the sax.

*He smoked weed.

*He had his way with ugly white women.

*Even now? Look at him; his wife works, and he doesn’t! And, he gets
a check from the government every month.

*Manufacturers announced today that they will be stocking America’s
shelves this week with ‘Clinton Soup in honor of one of the nations’
distinguished men. It consists primarily of a weenie in hot water.

*Chrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill Clinton.
The Dodge Drafter will be built in Canada.

*When asked what he thought about foreign affairs, Clinton replied,
“I don’t know, I never had one.”

*The Clinton revised judicial oath: “I solemnly swear to tell the truth as
I know it, the whole truth as I believe it to be, and nothing but what I
think you need to know.”

*Clinton will be recorded in history as the only President to do Hanky
Panky between the Bushes.

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Out for a stroll

Pinocchio, Snow White, and Superman are out for a stroll in town one day. As they walk, they come across a sign: “Beauty contest for the most beautiful woman in the world.”
“I am entering” said Snow White. After half an hour she comes out and they ask her, “Well, how did you do?”

” First Place ,” said Snow White.

They continue walking and they see a sign: “Contest for the strongest man in the world.”

“I’m entering,” says Superman. After half an hour he returns and they ask him, “How did you make out?”

” First Place ,” answers Superman. “Did you ever doubt?”

They continue walking when they see a sign: “Contest! Who is the greatest liar in the world?”

Pinocchio says “this is mine.” Half an hour later, he returns with tears in his eyes. “What happened?” they ask.

“Who the hell is Hillary?” asked Pinocchio.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$     Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age. As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. -Phyllis Diller

Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance? -Phyllis Diller

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.-Phyllis Diller

The reason women don’t play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.-Phyllis Diller

Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out. -Phyllis Diller

A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once. -Phyllis Diller

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them. -Phyllis Diller

Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going. -Phyllis Diller

Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed. -Phyllis Diller

We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up. -Phyllis Diller

Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room. -Phyllis Diller

What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.

-Phyllis Diller

The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.
-Phyllis Diller

His finest hour lasted a minute and a half. -Phyllis Diller

Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves. -Phyllis Diller

My photographs don’t do me justice -they just look like me. -Phyllis Diller

I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.
-Phyllis Diller

Tranquillizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle –  keep away from children.
-Phyllis Diller

I asked the waiter, ‘Is this milk fresh?’ He said, ‘Lady, three hours ago it was grass.’
-Phyllis Diller

The reason the golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing.
-Phyllis Diller

You know you’re old if they have discontinued your blood type. -Phyllis Diller

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Confucius
Say…

Wish I had read these when I was
younger…

Confucius Say….
Kiss is merely shopping upstairs, for merchandise downstairs.

Confucius Say…
Better to lose a love than love a loser.

Confucius Say…
Man with broken condom often called Daddy.

Confucius Say…

Sex is same as bank account. You put it in, you take it out….you lose interest.

Confucius Say…
Viagra just like Disneyland …One hour wait for 5 minute ride.

Confucius Say…
Much better to want the mate you do not have than to have the mate you do not
want.

Confucius Say…
Joke is like sex.
Neither any good if you don’t get it.