Having A Pun Attack!

“Puns”   to make you smile

  1. A SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE IN CHICAGO READs: We will heel you, We will save your sole, We will even dye for you.

2 A SIGN ON A BLINDS AND CURTAIN TRUCK: “Blind man driving.”

3. Sign over a Gynecologist’s Office: “Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”

4. In a Podiatrist’s office: “Time wounds all heels.”

5. On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels

6. At an Optometrist’s Office: “If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.”

7. On a Plumber’s truck: “We repair what your husband fixed.

”8. On another Plumber’s truck: “Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”

9. At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: “Invite us to your next blowout.”

10. On an Electrician’s truck: “Let us remove your shorts.”

11. In a Non-smoking Area: “If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action.”

12. On a Maternity Room door:” Push Push. Push.”

13. At a Car Dealership: “The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.”

14. Outside a Muffler Shop: …they really mean silencer… “No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”

15. In a Veterinarian’s waiting room: “Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”

16. At the Electric Company: “We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time. However, if you don’t, YOU will be de-lighted.”

17. In a Restaurant window: “Don’t stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”

18. In the front yard of a Funeral Home: “Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”

19. At a Propane Filling Station:”Thank Heaven for little grills.”

20. And the best one for last…; Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:“Caution – This Truck is full of Political Promises”

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