Chuckle for the Day

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That Ain’t Stanley
Stanley died in a fire and his body was burned pretty badly. The
morgue needed someone to identify the body, so they sent for his
two best deer hunting friends, Cooter and Gomer. The three men
had always hunted and fished together and were long time members
of a hunting camp. They were inseparable.
Cooter arrived first and when the mortician pulled back the sheet,
Cooter said, “Yup, his face is burned up pretty bad. You better roll
him over.”
The mortician rolled him over and Cooter said, “Nope, ain’t Stanley.”
The mortician thought this was rather strange, So he brought Gomer
in to confirm the identity of the body. Gomer looked at the body and
said, “Yup, he’s pretty well burnt up, roll him over. “The mortician
rolled him over and Gomer said, “No, it ain’t Stanley.” The mortician
asked, “How can you tell?” Gomer said, “Well, Stanley had two
ass-holes” “What! He had two ass-holes?” exclaimed the mortician.
“Yup, we never actually seen ’em but everybody used to say, ‘There’s
Stanley with them two ass-holes.'”
Cooter and Gomer are both now employed in the Obama administration
as planning, development, and strategy consultants.

Take this SImple Quiz.

As an engineer I love looking at data in graphic format. The numbers tell stories when they form pictures that the mind can absorb. Here is a graph that puts the horrible Sequester cuts in perspective. Thank you Dan Mitchell of International Liberty blog from where I lifted this image.

Take the quiz, answer the simple  question in the graphic, then ask yourself why are we fussing so much about this issue?
sequester-2013

Simple Amusements, Part Five – Pitching Pennies

PENNIES

            Once, while walking home down 93rd Street, I passed a group of men standing in front of Woodlawn Gardens.  They were playing a game on the sidewalk.  Naturally, I stopped to watch.  Each of  the men had a handful of pennies.  The sidewalks are five feet wide and have a groove every five feet.  The object of this game is to ‘lag’ or toss a penny to land on a designated line.  A player stands behind one line, usually with the side of his foot just touching the groove.  He holds the penny by its edges to keep it flat. Then, he tosses the penny. The best toss makes the coin fly like a saucer, and land flat.  The penny that lands closest to the line wins the round.  They played the games in sets of five or ten. To end the game, a player had to win three of the five games in the set.  It didn’t take long before all the boys on Avalon, Woodlawn, 93rd Street, Kimbark and all the other streets were playing “lag the penny.”  We even played during recess and lunch.  Just like in marbles, the same cliques of boys played together. It became a challenge for me to break into a game with the big guys in the sport.

Occasionally, we played for ‘keeps.’  In those games the winner got to keep the loser’s penny.