Dear Lord, We Thank You For. . .

I wish all  my friends, relatives, enemies, a very happy Thanksgiving.

You cannot eat healthcare.

Learning the Meaning of Dysfunctional

Dysfunctional Family

Dysfunctional Family (Photo credit: Chris Pirillo)

Many times I have read a movie description which proclaimed the film to be about a dysfunctional family or couple. I never truly understood the meaning of dysfunctional until a few days ago. Peg and I were planning our thanksgiving meal.  You must understand that Peg and I are widows who married. We have two sets of kids, two sets of grandkids, two sets of traditions, two sets of nationalities. This marriage isn’t like our first ones when we married young and stayed with our partners until “death do us part.” Because we started young we grew up together as a family. We adopted the good from our parents and families. These became traditions for us. It wasn’t long before I adopted the traditions of my young wife and she modified the traditions of my family to fit in. Together we set up a new tradition that was exclusively ours. Peg did the same with her husband.

Here we are in our mid-seventies trying to make everyone happy. Simple things like “what time should we serve?” become a major debate.

“My kids all have to work and can’t come until late.”

“Well, my kids have young children and they can’t stay late.”

Suddenly, the meaning of dysfunctional began to roll through my mind. Is this what they mean? Suddenly, two families merged into one begin behaving outside their norms. Will we ever live long enough to create a new tradition that melds the two families together?

If we do succeed, it will be because Peg and I will concede and drop hosting the holiday meals by delegating the job to our children and grandchildren, who I am positive will make us happy by providing our favorite traditional dishes from all nationalities.

I look forward to this year as the most dysfunctional Thanksgiving ever.

Thanks Mom!

English: Picture of a slice of homemade Pastic...

English: Picture of a slice of homemade Pastichio, a Greek dish taught to me by my mother. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .

“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside.. I just finished cleaning.”

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.

“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.

“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.

“Because I said so, that’s why.”

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .

“If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.

“Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”

7. My mother taught me IRONY.

“Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about.”

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .

“Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTION-ISM.

“Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA ..

“You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.

“This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.

“If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate!”

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.

“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out..”

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .

“Stop acting like your father!”

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.

“There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do.”

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.

“Just wait until we get home.”

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING .

“You are going to get it when you get home!”

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.

“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way.”

19. My mother taught me ESP.

“Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?”

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.

“When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .

“If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.

“You’re just like your father.”

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.

“Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”

24. My mother taught me WISDOM .

“When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.”

And my favorite:

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.

“One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you !”

Only you folks my age understand these profound statements!!!

But, there is one missing from this list~~My personal all time favorite!!

26. My mother taught me about CHOICE.

“Do you want me to stop this car?”

The only  thing my Mom didn’t teach me is how to translate these things into English from Hungarian.

Fallacious Reasoning

Washington D.C. - Lincoln Memorial

Washington D.C. – Lincoln Memorial (Photo credit: DerFussi)

A close friend made me aware of a website called Citizen Link. They are a family advocacy organization and have many articles dealing with family issues, marriage, children, etc. They made an interesting video message for President Obama. The message is simple and effective. It points to our history and makes a valid argument against the fallacious reasoning in some of President Obama’s  policies. I invite you to click on the button and watch this video, it is less than three minutes long, and will share some very interesting history about our country and Washington DC.

Stoplight: A Walk for the President

A Walk

Dear Senator Durban

Prestwick Area Garden Club Budget

Dear Senator Durbin:

Please take note of the above graphic. It is a budget. It is by a group of women who never worked a day in their lives (stay at home mom’s).  I feel you need to see this because it has been so long since you and your fellow Senators have looked at a budget, and worse yet since you approved one.  It is not a hard thing to do, one must look at income, and limit spending to equal the income. It really is that simple. Now, let me see you try that. Is it so hard for you and your elitist fellows to get simple concepts into your cranium’s overly crammed with political rhetoric?

Your loyal over taxed Illinois citizen,

Grumpa Joe

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