Last night I watched a 1975 movie called “Rooster Cogburn” starring John Wayne and Katharine Hepburn. The plot reminded me of the many westerns I watched in black and white as a kid that involved a stagecoach robbery. Today, while reviewing my American Express charges, I found one for $309. The only large charges I have like that are from the local supermarkets. This charge was listed as
| EZ TEXTING 690550110Santa Monica CA | $309.00 |
There was a time when I used a texting service to communicate with my fellow Lions members, but I never spent more than $25 for a mass text. At the usual rate of a nickel per, this meant I must have sent 6180 texts. We have only 75 members, and that pencils out to 82 messages per member. There is no way I ever sent that many text messages to anyone in my life. The Republicans running our country, however, easily send me that many texts daily. They never ask for money, but there’s no way to leave a message without checking a box linked to a donation. Clever these people are. If only they were that clever at outwitting the Democrats.
Anyway, this line item presented a challenge. It took me about twenty minutes to outwit the Artificial Intelligence (AI) bot before I was able to release some of the steam building in my aged cranium. Here is a transcript from this conversation I had with Alliyah, the chat agent holding a gun at my head.
- Today • 1:19 PM
Hello, thanks for reaching out. We will be with you shortly.
- EE
EZ-Bot Enhanced joined • 1:20 PM
- Hi, thanks for chatting in today!
- EE
What do you need help with? Please choose one of the following:
EZ-Bot Enhanced • 1:20 PM
- Find help with Knowledge Base
- My account or message is under review
- Transfer to Live Chat
- Transfer to Live Chat
Sent • 1:20 PM
- EE
Please enter a detailed description of your inquiry, and I will contact an online Agent.
EZ-Bot Enhanced • 1:20 PM
- I received a charge of $309.00 made on 2/27/26. Please tell me what this was for?
Sent • 1:22 PM
- Transfer requested at 1:22 PM
- EE
EZ-Bot Enhanced left • 1:22 PM
- AF
Alliyah F joined • 1:24 PM
- You are now connected to an agent, thank you for waiting.
- AF
Hi, my name is Alliyah and I’m with the EZ Texting support team. I’m sorry to hear that you got charged on your account. No worries, I’m here to help! Can you please provide your email address or account ID?
Alliyah F • 1:25 PM
- What is the charge for $309. on my american express card on Feb 27 2026 made for?
Read • 1:25 PM
- AF
Can you please provide your email address or account ID?
Alliyah F • 1:26 PM
Read • 1:26 PM
- Thank you for providing that information! Upon checking your account, the charge was from your annual plan which is the Launch Plan.
- AF
And your annual plan got renewed on February 25, 2026.
Alliyah F • 1:27 PM
- Please cancel that renewal?
Read • 1:28 PM
- AF
I can go ahead and cancel it, are you not going to use the service anymore?
Alliyah F • 1:29 PM
- No, I am no longer in a position that requires me. to mass text.
Read • 1:29 PM
- I understand, I have now canceled your account and moving forward, you will not be charge again, and please be informed that as part of our sign-up process, all users agree to our Terms of Service, which include our no-refund policy. This policy states that once a subscription is processed, we’re unfortunately unable to issue a refund—even if the service is not used afterward. Please refer to this link (https://www.eztexting.com/terms).
- AF
For this one, aside from canceling your account, is there anything else I can assist you?
Alliyah F • 1:33 PM
- I have read the terms you pointed me to. I do not recall signing up for automatic renewal, and I would not have used the service knowing that an AI bandit would hold me up for such a huge amount of money.
Read • 1:36 PM
- AF
I understand, please be informed that EZ Texting’s only payment method is auto-renewal and it has been since the day you sign-up for our service. I understand how important this is to you but again, I apologize, we don’t have a way to refund it anymore.
Alliyah F • 1:38 PM
- If there was such a thing as an AI Sheriff, I would have you arrested and jailed for theft.
Read • 1:42 PM
- AF
I’m sorry, the only way for you to not be charge before was to canceled the account before the renewal date but on this one, since there were no cancelation, it is automatic for the plan to auto-renew. I’m sorry but this is from our policy.
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ While searching the net to find this useless link, I saw several that contained the word ‘Apple’ in them. With Apple’s backing, they are sure to be a winner. I now understand why.
In my last note to this foreign agent, I invented the Artificial Intelligence Sheriff (AIS). There is no doubt that the AIS will become a reality as more and more helpless senior internet users have their pockets picked.
Beware, my fellow senior citizens, and be certain to read the fine print in those endless pages of rules we blindly agree to when downloading an application that will make our lives easier.
To Apple: Please include a feature(button) on your computers that, when pressed, would automatically blow up any website I deem to be an Internet Bandit. It would please me immensely, even if all it did was light up my screen with a loud “BANG!”
Sincerely:
Artificial Intelligence Sheriff, AKA, Grumpa Joe
Filed under: Aging, Democrats, family, Republicans, Seniors | Tagged: Artificial Intelligence Bandit, Artificial Intelligence Sherriff, Democrat, Republican |
Can an autopay be cancelled by closing one’s checking acct or credit card acct so that autopays would be impossible for the vender to charge ? Can your bank intervene in your behalf ? Would being a member of Lifelock or other such service advocate for you ? I do not have any banks or cards on google passwords. Anything financial I log into manually every time so no financial info log in on my computer. .
Wouldn’t it be nice if we were given a week after death to straighten the loose ends of our lives?
I think we should band together and invent a BOT to interact with the soulless corporate BOTs on behalf of harried consumers. We can call it ePHUTT – Endless Proxy Helper for Useless Time-wasting Transactions, or some such thing.