It is unusual for me to rant about the same company two days in a row, but my current favorite Apple, has raised my concern. This morning I read a news bit about Apple developing a car. I didn’t know whether to cry or laugh my ass off. This company that sits on a mountain of cash because of its current product line which they pretend to know a lot about is looking at getting into something they know nothing about. Excuse me Apple, but when you get your existing computers, and software right maybe you can take on a new project.
All day long I kept getting visions of an Apple car streaming through my mind. Like driving along in my Apple-aero when a message on the dash display reads “Upgrade available, download immediately. Push not now or it will happen automatically in 59 seconds.” Or how about a sudden shutdown that lasts for an instant and then resumes as if nothing has ever happened. Since we are all smart and believe in keeping our Apple products current we upload each new upgrade as soon as it arrives, but then the car does not work with any of the government infrastructure like auto slow, or stop for red lights because the Apple gurus decided older car models didn’t need the feature anymore.
Maybe I’m getting excited prematurely, but I just don’t see these guys owning the smarts it takes to design and build a car.
I had another flash that I was driving along when the car changed directions. A message flashed on the dash display, “your route has been changed to take you to the XYZ donut shop to take advantage of the daily special.”
I’m driving along when the message says “connection lost, manual intervention required.” I panic as I don’t know how to get to the destination without a functioning GPS, and I can’t ask SIRI because the system is down.
I’m sorry Apple, but you haven’t convinced me that your computer scientists know how to dress themselves, and the thought of having them design a car for me is scary as hell.
Another message appears, “Upgrade required to fix bugs in the braking, and steering systems.”