Who On Earth Dreams These Up?

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How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.

· Venison for dinner again? Oh! Deer.

· A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.

· I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

· Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.

· England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

· I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

· They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Typo.

· I changed my iPod’s name to Titanic. It’s syncing now.

· Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

· I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.

· I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

· This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I’d never met herbivore.

· When chemists die, they barium.

· I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can’t put it down.

· I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

· Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.

· I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

· When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

· Broken pencils are pointless.

· What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus.

· I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.

· All the toilets in New York’s police stations have been stolen.
The police have nothing to go on.

· I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

· Velcro – what a rip off.

· Don’t worry about old age; it doesn’t last.

7 Responses

  1. Click on the cartoon, it takes you to a site loaded with cartoon puns.

  2. This is going straight to my Facebook feed!

  3. […] Source: Who On Earth Dreams These Up? […]

  4. Love them. You are right. Who dreams these up? And then patiently compiles them? It used to be said that a lot of text jokes were commissioned by telcos to increase the usage of their services through repeated forwards. But in the days of WhatsApp, who knows what’s up?

  5. The baker tried to open a second store but he did not have enough bread.

Comments are closed.

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